Wednesday, August 15, 2007

We're Not in Arcana Anymore - Sun Times MiniSpeak; Mini-Tru; MiniMal!

"Old Worker Joe Speaks the Lingo!",cst-edt-edits15ab.article

From Today's (8/15/'07) Sun Times Commentary:

Dictoral gov should be ashamed of his actions

Anyone else blink at that one in Today's CST Commentary? Dictoral ? I heard it before? Where? Misprint for dictatorial? Neologism? Let's Get Into it! Edgey Word.

Goodle Search - "Did you mean Doctoral?" Nope Dictoral - check NEWS - Yep. Only Sun Times. Dictoral + Dictionary: Eureka! Hellatine Dictionary of Bureaucratese

Consistent - Goofy; phoney; pretentious, but Consistent. Hence, my near daily satiric renderings and legal/eagle monitorings by the poor goof in Bensenville ( watching my silly blog for hours on end for the Powerful and the Simpy) on the Snooty Sun Times - Post July 15th Manifesto:

Here's some words you can expect to see from Commisar Reed's blottered and stamped dictates:

adj., Powerless; futile; impotent. Also anorchistry.
(L. an orchis: without testicles)

n., a transipidate pairing of terms, where even the dullest of comparisons seems bright.
(Gr. anoxy: without air + moron: air-head)

v., To reduce a statement to absolute brevity without loss of context.
(L. aprica: peach pit )

n., Irrational fear of repeating an error.
(Gr. psodos: stammering)

n. an impossibility plausibly presented, as is good science fiction. Also ardnassic.
(orig. unknown)

adj. Blunt or dull; without distinguishing characteristics.
(L. ab rostrum: without nose)

Any component designed to fail under stress in order to halt further progress, with the intention of limiting further damage.
(orig. uncert.)

n., Any keystroke struck in frustration, most typically in an attempt to revive a frozen system. The group secretary could be heard asking Tech Support, "so
where's the asskey"?
(orig. Southern US dial., ASCII)

n., A verbal communication which cleverly conveys non-verbal clues. "The comptrollers attitone made it clear that the Sisyphus Project would continue."
(comb. attitude + tone)

adj. Having the properties of, or resembling an aun. adv., In an aun-like fashion.
(Aun. aun: aun)

n., The level of indwelling risk of or proclivity toward being or becoming a loose cannon. The tendency to go off half-cocked.
(Gr. auto: self + L. mitto: to send)

adj., Rubelike; guiless by virtue of ignorance. Innately or congenitally defective.
(Gr.a: without + zaphos: pinch or short measure. Refers to a facial defect associated with incestuous origin)

adj., Presenting a cold, negative manner, e.g. when faced with an interview, and clamming up, and becoming reserved, monosyllabic, difficult.
(botany. barbate: covered in short stout spikes or sharp scales.)

adj., Unshakable in an erroneous conviction or belief. also barmstrength
(Brit. slang. barmy: crazy + Eng. strong )

n., An innocuous nonesense reply used to gently dismiss the statement or opinion of someone that does not realize the meaniningless nature of the reply. "James routinely countered the impossible requests from his ignorant manager with eloquent barshamana, which was always accepted simply as technical jargon."
(Yid. barshamana: sheep manure)

v., to consider a decision only under immediate duress.
(OE, beable: the deaf and mute guard traditionally stationed at the door of the torture chamber)

n., Ingrained mediocrity or laziness jealously defended by the corporate culture.
(Malout Beba, 14th century cult leader espousing sleep as the highest form of active meditation.)

adj., Overgrown; weedy; a xygency of neglect.
(Rastafarian: b'dread'd: with superlative dreadlocks)

n., A bouscent, jenking bureaucrat; one that constantly annoys and alienates all his co-workers.
(OE: beele: an inferior rat dog.)

n., An unpleasant but necessary action which has no alternative. "It was a bissenstein for Dave to proose the amended legislation."
(Ger: bissenstein or bissen stein: a kissing stone or to kiss stone)

v., To strigulate or halt a process by focus on unimportant detail or details. n., the element of a discussion or negotiation which, without merit, forms the basis for impasse or filibuster. Also blagery.
(It. blaggio: a stomach cramp.)

v., To come in while the worker isn't there and alter a project he's been working on so that it no longer works. To surreptitiously remove an essential part of a device. "Wood blilbed the aluminum prism out of René Blondlot's N ray device. Blondlot saw no change, thus proving that N rays were a figment of his imagination."
(Hebr. bli leb: with the heart missing)

n., Work innocently performed off-book; untraceable items added to or removed from a file or document without any authorization, paper trail, supporting research, or fraudulent intent. The hallmarks of bobwork are twofold: 1.) the file or document establishes troublesome precedent, and 2.) The precedent cannot be rescinded or ammended, since its source is obscured.
(Orig. in blame of generic unavailable person: "I think Bob handled that case before he went into the nursing home.")

n., A state of resigned paranoia.
(Bohic: the historically most frequently conquered people in Europe)

v., To dress up or improve a mediocre product by use of a showy presentation or slick marketing; the use of flarbage.
(L. bonus: good + Gr. girdle)

n., A seemingly ironclad proposal with a purposely built-in achilles heel. Software which later allows the developer inappropriate access to customer data.
(Sipanyi mythol, Bos Nog: the Bull with a hollow horn)

Remember when Working People used words common to the fellow citizen? Well, this is a Brave New World: Murderers are victims of Police Misconduct; people who live near Durkin Park are 'close-knit ethnic racists;' Crown Heights Al Sharpton is a Tonic To Chicago; the more Lawsuit Lottery Ticket Lawyers get huge help ( almost daily basis) from a big newspaper and sue the City of Chicago for millions of taxpayers dollars no matter how ridiculous the claim, the better Working People will be. MiniTru Dat!


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