Thursday, August 25, 2011

Tales of the South Side - The Truth Will Always Out; Loud Mouthed Nosey Bastard!

Mossy Enright had been drinking at Keegan's Pub from bell to bell. Dark-haired Bridget finally said that the bar is closing, "Mossy, come up for air. Time to call it a day.' So the sixty-three Vietnam Vet stood up to leave and fell flat on his face. Mossy tried to stand one more time; same result. Bridget the bartender pleaded, "Mossy let me take you home, or call you a cab."

"Tut, BurrRidge-it. I make . . . my own way, Charlie never called me a cab in Quang Tri. Thanks Hunny.Showa Vet some Respect, Kiddo."

Mossy figured he'd crawl outside and get some fresh air and maybe that will sober him up. Once outside, he stood up and fell on his face again. Short trip home - no sweat. Mount Carmel football was tougher than this.

Mossy(which is Irish for Maurice) Enright had been in tougher situations and so the much decorated grunt decided to crawl the four blocks home. When he arrived at the door. he stood up and fell flat on his face. He crawled through the door and into his bedroom. When he reached his bed. he tried one more time to stand up. This time Mossy managed to pull himself upright, but he quickly fell right into the bed and went sound asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow. The REM cycle blew a flat.

Mossy was awakened the next morning to his high school sweet-heart Annie, the Flower of Longwood Academy 1967 who married Mossy before he went to 'Nam and welcomed him home and helped him adjust, finish at De Paul with an accounting degree, father kids, work up the ladder of the biggest firm in Chicago and live for decades in West Beverly's St. John Fisher Parish and retire comfortably. Annie was standing over him, shouting, "SO YOU'VE BEEN DRINKING AGAIN!"

"Jesus, Annie, I ain't deaf."

Putting on an innocent look, and intent on bluffing it out he said, "What makes you say that?"

"Bernard just called from Keegans; you left your wheelchair there again!"

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