Howdy, Folks, this is the Old Ranger bringing you our news from the Driving Range at 50 Acres Park in Evergreen Park, Illinois!
Well, Folks, the bucket blasters have been hitting farther down range, now that the weather has turned around -like a Kardashian spouse.
Why only yesterday, I was out at 5:45 AM riding the range on my trusty Kubota Public Works vehicle and learned that:
- Someone has been hitting all the way out to the 300 yard marker or there abouts. There were at least two dozen white roundies all nestled in the tall grass
- Our Bucket Buyers ( $ 5 for small and $ 10 for a large) are Slicers and not Hookers. Must have been several hundred Titleist pearls hugging the right side range net and I had to dismount the Kubota more times than my old back can tolerate - not complainin' mind you, just sayin'
- Beer is still $3 for Miller High Life, Miller Lite and $4 for Modelo
- We have Snickers, Skittles, M & Ms ( plain and peanut), Chips and Slim Jims for measly $1.00 each
- Hot dogs, chips and a can of Pepsi, Sprite or Water for $ 3.00.
- A crew of rangers, including yours truly, who serve your desires - Shucks Gino, Frank, Dan, Steve and me would come over and make you breakfast, if Mayor Jim Sexton gave us the go -ahead.
- The Disc Golfers are thicker than flies on a used Slo-Poke left on a porch swing
- Dogs are having more fun than a teenage boy with two . . .paper routes
- Mr. Kevin Kelly ( Leo HS '70) inspected the facilities and questioned the Old Ranger about his get-up-and-go and that sassy hitch in his step
50 Acres Park is best out door fun on the south side.
Come on out; jaw with us Rangers; visit the horse barn;
hit some of that white range caviar out to the far markers; grab a beer and a pop at our umbrella shaded tables and have some vigorous and healthy exercise!
Well, I must attach the big rake to my trusty Kubota and clean up the campus. The Old Ranger needs to see more of you, Folks!
See you all on the range at 50 Acres Park - 2701 West 91st Street - in Evergreen Park Illinois!
