Monday, July 11, 2011

Ars Amatoria When the Discovery Channel Came to Keegan's Pub

Me Venus artificem tenero praefecit Amori * P. OVIDIVS NASO
(43 B.C. – 17 A.D.)

An Octopus walks into Keegan's Pub on Western Ave. and says "I can play any musical instrument you like".

Seb(astian) Costin, Keegan's resident Jazz guru and Cat of the 1st Order, gives him a guitar, which it plays better than Peter Bernstein, or Wes Montgomery - Down Here on the Ground!

Celebrated roofer and roué of legend, Eddie Carroll, was amused.

"Wow! Try this!" and Seb rolls over an upright Steinway 88, which the cephalopod mollusc played better than Errol Garmer's . I Remember April.

The Morgan Park Chevalier Eddie Carrol cocked an eyebrow in bemused interest.

Donal McBennett from the Isle of Sky - he's no very big and he's awfully shy - throws the creature a set of HEELAND bagpipes.The octopus fumbles about for a couple of minutes without a sound from the bagpipes and the Scotsman wails, "Whut's wrooong, Ken ye no play ut"?

The octopus rejoins, "Play It? I'm gonna screw her brains out once I get her pajamas off!"

Eddie Carroll, the celebrated roofing contractor and swordsman, is mildly amused. "As in all things, roofing and love, first things first." And Eddie alighted from his stool and awed one and all . . .

. . .as is His wont.

*Venus appointed me as guide to gentle Love

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