Aniston is the one who is not Zelweger. Though both are indistinguishable and equally repellent.
I have been working with a new fund-raising software here at Leo High School since about 6 A.M. and I am sweating like a strumpet on the Pope's lap. Leo H.S. was built in 1921 by Chicago architect Joseph McCarthy ( of Burnham's shop) and this limestone and mortar building retains heat like Kirstie Ally do lard. My inner wall cubicle (windowless) is about 85 degrees on a cool day.
I took a stroll to the Aquafina Bottled water Machine for a buck's worth of deep chilled water from some sump pump in BassAss MN - Ahhhhhhhh! I clicked on Google News and caught Stupid Shrapnel from a burst of Entertainment. I'm Hit!!!!! Jennifer Aniston (serial whiner) is disappointed in love yet again!
Bradley Cooper has a new enemy: Brad Pitt's ex-wife.Jennifer Aniston "honestly feels screwed over" after her date with the "Hangover" star didn't lead to a second, reports US Weekly.
"She wanted to turn her date with Cooper into something," a source told the magazine of duo's dinner date in New York on June 18
A few weeks later, Cooper was out with Renee Zellweger, but apparently Aniston "doesn't see what Renee has that she doesn't," the insider tells US.
Perhaps it is what Zellweger doesn't have that Cooper likes says: ie, no drama.
"She just does her thing, has her friends and her life and is cool. She's really happy and doesn't need anyone to feel complete," the magazine quotes another insider as saying about Zellweger.
But Aniston's going to be alright, adds a pal. Why? "She's used to rejection."
Yikes! With friends like that...
Time for action! I made some calls and took a drive south.
Okay , me and the guys at Kean had ponied up some dough for just such an occasion. We are going to dowry you Jennifer. We went over to the apartments on 103rd over by Jewels and made our offer to Charming Andy Brosnan ( County Kerry Born and Now a U.S. Citizen) with our offer of $74.86 and a pack of Marlboro Reds. This Celtic eye candy up above is your man, Jennifer. Take his hand and love him. He will NOT cheat on you. You are past the heart breaks!
Now, I got stuff to do.
Don't make us do this again. I mean it.