Irish Columnist Kevin Myers Explains The World Media and Leftist Activist Oedipal Complex

Kevin Myers is required reading.

In today's offering, Myers succinctly and wittily explains the strange workings of the Leftist Mind. Click my post title for the full article.

The new force of Islamic fundamentalism in European life has now confounded the liberal media. The latter's "pro-anti" instincts are baffled, and its political compass sent haywire by the many contradictory components of Islamic fundamentalism. It is Asian, so it must be "good". It is anti-government: good also. It is anti-western: very good indeed. And it is anti-US: why, quite excellent, indeed, best of all!

BUT then you get to the message that these protesters are preaching: a loathing of democracy, of freedom, of women, of homosexuality, of Jews and all the tolerances of the bien-pensant. Oh here now. This is not quite cricket.

The intellectual incoherence with which the liberal media respond to neo-Nazi Islamicists is almost delightful: news coverage of a recent Islamic rally in London, in which protesters were carrying numerous placards, "Behead those who insult Islam", and "We Will Exterminate You", were simply edited by picture desks so as to conceal these messages. But news footage of the British National Front usually focuses on any imagery or wording that has echoes of the Third Reich because, of course, German Nazism and the British street-right are authorised enemies of all decencies. However, the media is still not so sure about Islamic fundamentalism. How do you solve a problem like Sharia?

Max Weismann Presents -The Articles of Man

From the Executive Director of Center fro the Study of Great Ideas, Max Weismann, comes the codified Articles of Man - to be confused and fused with Man Law ( click my post title)


1: Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.

2: It is OK for a man to cry ONLY under the following circumstances:

a) When a heroic dog dies to save its master.
b) The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her Blouse.
c) After wrecking your boss's car.
d) When she is using her teeth.

3: Any man who brings a camera to a stag night may be legally killed and eaten by his friends.

4: If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever unless you actually marry her.

5: Moaning about the brand of free beer in a mate's fridge is forbidden. However complain at will if the temperature is unsuitable.

6: No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your mate's birthday is strictly optional. At that point, you must celebrate at a strip bar of the birthday boy's choice.

7: In the mini-bus, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest.

8: When stumbling upon other blokes watching a sporting event, you may ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who is playing.

9: You may fart in front of a woman only after you have brought her to climax. If you trap her head under the covers for the purpose of flatulent entertainment (commonly known as a Dutch oven), she's officially your girlfriend.

10: It is permissible to drink a fruity alcohol drink only when you're sunning on a tropical beach ... and it's delivered by a topless model and only when it's free.

11: Only in situations of moral and/or physical peril are you allowed to kick another guy in the nuts.

12: Unless you're in prison, never fight naked.

13: Friends don't let friends wear Budgie Smugglers. Ever. Issue closed.

14: If a man's fly is down, that's his problem, you didn't see anything.

15: Women who claim they 'love to watch sports' must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to drink as much as the other sports watchers.

16: A man in the company of a hot, suggestively dressed woman must remain sober enough to fight.

17: Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both, that's just greedy.

18: If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you'd better be talking about his choice of beer.

19: Never join your girlfriend or wife in discussing a friend of yours, except if she's withholding sex pending your response.

20: Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal footing i.e., both urinating, both waiting in line, etc. For all other situations, an almost imperceptible nod is all the conversation you need.

21: Never allow a telephone conversation with a woman to go on longer than you are able to have sex with her. Keep a stopwatch by the phone. Hang up if necessary.

22: The morning after you and a girl who was formerly 'just a friend' have carnal, drunken monkey sex. The fact that you're feeling weird and guilty is no reason for you not to nail each other again before the discussion occurs about what a big mistake it was.

23: It is acceptable for you to drive her car. It is not acceptable for her to drive yours.

24: Thou shall not buy a car in the colors of brown, pink, lime, green, orange or sky blue.

25: The girl who replies to the question 'What do you want for Christmas?' with 'If you loved me, you'd know what I want!' gets an Xbox 360. End of story.

26: There is no reason for guys to watch Ice Skating or Men's Gymnastics. Ever.

*N.B. Man Law - 21 rule : No matter what, the 21 rule is always in effect. No matter what, no if ands or buts. Click my post title

Emphases -My Own

Thomson Townies Talk Terrorist Tourists

"While Illinois Gov. Pat Quinn and Sen. Dick Durbin, both Democrats, welcomed the possibility of locking up Guantanamo detainees at Thomson, several other Illinois lawmakers objected, warning that it would make the Chicago area a terrorist target.

But some folks who live in the shadow of the prison don't buy that." Huffington Post



Thomson, Illinois - ( The Home of Kettles of Thomson, Illinois - Ma and Pa and the twenty four kids. Planned Parenthood wanted to do a study. Pa said "Naw." Ma is taking Pa's Union Suit out of the wash boiler*.)

*Wash Boiler - A vessel of sheet-metal in which clothes to be washed are boiled.



Ma Kettle: [about Pa's underwear] It's the latest thing, Billy Reed said they'd fit perfectly.
Pa Kettle: They probably would if he were in them with me!
Ma Kettle: [laughs] Well, we'll just pin them up for right now, they'll shrink once I wash them. Pa, I always seem to be scoldin' you.
Pa Kettle: I know, Ma. You do all the barkin', but it's me that's always in the doghouse

Ma Kettle: Pa, you're lazier than that old hound dog we used to have.
Pa Kettle: Which one?
Ma Kettle: The one that used to lean against the wall when she barked.

(Shotgun Smith stops by) Mornin' Ma! Mornin' Pa tell you 'bout the news I saw?

Ma & Pa - Naw!

Shotgun- Terrorists a Comin'!

Pa Kettle: I thought they might be a traveling salesmen. A lot of them visit farms, you know.

Shotgun: Yeah, I've heard stories about them.

Ma Kettle: Thomas Edison's first name was Thomas!

Pa and Shotgun - Don't say.

City of Chicago Streets and Sanitation Heroes - Great Job!

I left the house at 5:45 A.M. and the side streets Maplewood - Rockwell & etc. were thick and deep with powdery white stuff. At 107th Street East Bound - it was as clear as President Obama - "Let me be perfectly clear!"

Perfectly clear on Western Ave. Northbound! I stopped at Karim's Flagship Dunkin' Donuts on 104th and grabbed a tall one for the ride from Bidya - "Good Morning, Patreek!"

Back onto Western and fair sailed to 87th Street and again it was as clear as a teenage girl's face before the St. Rita Homecoming! Ashland ditto, from what I could tell, as was Loomis.

I headed northbound at Racine and the street was clear as was 79th Street.

I pulled into the lot at Leo High School ( cleared by our fine team ( Derrick, James and Commanding Officer Ronnell Reynolds) at 6:15 A.M.

Wonderful job by the 19th, 18th, and 17th Ward Sanitation Crews!

The Chicago Streets and Sanitation heroes - the guys behind the plows did another magnificent job for the Citizens of Chicago! God Bless you and keep you safe!

New Jersey on Gay Marriage - Fugedaboudit!

"Madon! Civil Unions, I ain't got no kick. The Wedding Cake and Knights of Columbus Hall after the nuptials for Allan and Allen? Fugedaboudit."

TRENTON, N.J. -- New Jersey's state Senate has defeated a bill to legalize gay marriage, the latest in a string of setbacks for advocates.

The defeat, by a vote of 20-14, likely ends any chance that the state Legislature approves gay marriage soon. Five senators did not vote; there is one Senate vacancy.

Gay rights advocates had been pushing hard for the bill because on Jan. 19, new Republican Gov. Chris Christie takes office and he has vowed to veto a gay marriage bill. Outgoing Democratic Gov. Jon Corzine had promised to sign it into law.

It was a major effort to get the bill to a full Senate. A vote was canceled last month when it appeared the measure would be defeated there. It wasn't until Tuesday that Senate leaders decided to allow the vote.

New Jersey offers civil unions that grant the legal rights of marriage to gay couples.

Confessions of Substitute Teacher, Part II:1967 Meets 2010 - Snow Day at Leo

I had a blast in the classroom. A science teacher resigned the day before the Second Semester began ( Monday Jan. 4, 2010). I have not been in the classroom since 1993 and that was as an English Teacher. We began class with Memorare* - the kids are hugely non-Catholic but they seem to like the idea of Christ's Mother watching over our work.

Physics - we considered the Greek Atomists and concentrated on Heraclitus:

" Nothing is Constant, but Change" - the gentleman of Leo took that paradoxical aphorism to interesting levels of discussion with regard to -

1. Icy Hot Sports Balm - Cold Burns; Pain indicates Healing; Forethought ( Prudence)is an empirical process.

2. Falling Bodies - Milton's Satan; Newton's Law - falling bodies drop at the rate of 32' per second & etc.

3. Heraclitus' River Saga - Flux; Coinstantiation -


Environmental Science - The development of the Chicago Sanitary District in 1899 - Cholera; The Stockyards; water locks; flooding

1. Reviewed this weeks Asian Carp gambit by the Sierra Club/State of Michigan v. Illinois

2. Every student wondered how all this snow Chicago Enjoys, more on the way, melting and rain would impact on their homes if the U.S. Supreme Court went goofy and decided to order the Army Corps of Engineers to close the Locks. Universally, - we would flood.


Chemistry - Periodic Table of Elements ( History of its Development) Atom Weight/Atomic Mass - Acids and Bases:

1. Live Lab Hickey's Tea - Reaction: Howls of Derisive laughter - "Hickey, OG, that's nasty!!!"

2. Conclusion: cream and lemon is a bad idea Acids and Bases require greater scrutiny by chemistry neophytes in the instructor's Chair.

3. Bacon goes nicely with Tea - Roger Bacon, OFM (c. 1214–1294), - Doctor Mirabilis Grand Daddy of Scientific Method and Gun Powder.

I left the House at 5:30 A.M. and arrived here at Leo by 6:10 taking Western Ave ( which was magnificently treated by the Snow Plow Teams. Well Done. Racine Ave. is tough to drive due to the buses at 86Th Street. 79th Street - like Western Ave. is well maintained. Outstanding work by the 19th, 18th and 17th Ward Streets and Sanitation heroes!!!!

Classes are rightfully cancelled.

This weather reminds me of 1967. I predict that we may see drifts creating pyramids from garages and kids pulling sleds full of bread and milk.

The young men of Leo High School are magnificent! Challenging, funny, respectful, patient and tough, these young men were saddled with 57 year old south side Irish dinosaur and performed and learned something this week. Make no mistake, there were moments - a few mind you - when they well less than attentive. Hell, I would have been right with the more profound knuckleheads in my classes. Nevertheless, (and that was a word that cracked them up when I applied it to a suggestion that we not do work) we did a lot of learning in the last three day. I am giving my Physics section a Blue Book Essay Exam, upon their return to classes. My guess is Snow Day tomorrow.

These young men come from the Chicago Shooting Galleries of Roseland, Englewood, Chatham, Brainerd, Morgan Park, Auburn/Gresham and several gentleman from the West Side. They worry about staying alive - In Fact, I am safer than these kids. God Bless and Keep you in His Care, Gents! My morning Memorare always has you Gents in mind.

I enjoyed myself thoroughly.

*

Remember, O most gracious Virgin Mary, that never was it known that anyone who fled to thy protection, implored thy help, or sought thine intercession was left unaided.
Inspired by this confidence, I fly unto thee, O Virgin of virgins, my mother; to thee do I come, before thee I stand, sinful and sorrowful. O Mother of the Word Incarnate, despise not my petitions, but in thy mercy hear and answer me.

Amen.

Carp Crappola Cuomo! Chicago Tribune - Points Out Panic Peddling! Well Done!

It is heart-warmimg to see the Chicago Tribune waltz around the earnest panic peddlers of the Sierra Club, a Michigan Republican Snake Oil Salesman, Andrew "What's My Line" Cuomo and the easily spooked tabloid junkies in knit caps and Birkenstocks.

The Lads of Leo High School ( Environmental Science Sections 4& 5) and their Substitute Science Victim ( Your Humble Servant) are considering the history of the Water Reclamation District and this latest "WE NEED TO ACT NOW!" Dodge by the collectivist folks who gave us - Cap'N Trade, The Bank Bail-outs, GM (Government Motors) and the current Vote on Government Health Care.

I need to ACT FAST! Class is starting

This is all moving fast -- the Supreme Court could issue an emergency order as soon as Friday.

Without this fix, Michigan Attorney General Michael Cox claims, these fish will complete their "unrelenting march" to inflict "environmental and economic disaster." The fears aren't unreasonable, but they don't call for panic. Closing locks that serve as major shipping channels would cause serious economic damage throughout the region and should be considered only a last resort. Fortunately, there is time to weigh other options to find a less disruptive way to keep the carp out of Lake Michigan.

Last month, the Illinois Department of Natural Resources dumped poison in the canal to prevent unwanted migration into the lake when an electric fish barrier was turned off for maintenance. Lots of fish turned up dead, but only one Asian carp. That suggests that the barrier has been largely effective and that the number of carp in nearby rivers is minimal, making an immediate mass invasion unlikely.

There is always the possibility that the Asian carp could make their way past the barrier into Lake Michigan, of course. Fortunately, that would not necessarily be the fatal blow often portrayed. A few of the fish have been caught in Lake Erie in recent years, but so far there are no signs they have gained a permanent foothold.

That could indicate the Great Lakes are not a suitable habitat, if only because the plankton the carp need is already being gobbled up by other invaders, such as zebra mussels. The carp might be too late to the party.

It wouldn't be smart to place complete reliance on that reassuring prospect. Given the harm the carp could possibly do to Lake Michigan and the other Great Lakes, more steps are needed to prevent an invasion. Illinois officials know that.

But Michigan and the other states are in full panic attack. Let's hope the Supreme Court doesn't buy into the hysteria.

More Photos of John O'Sullivan Worth Township Democratic Committeeman at Bourbon Street -01/04/2010

Here are some photos for the crowd and the excitement generated in support of the candidacy of John O'Sullivan for Worth Township Democratic Committeeman at Bourbon Street on January 4th 2010.

Confessions of a Substitute Teacher Semester II at Leo High School

A teacher resigned over the Christmas break - a science teacher. I was asked to fill in the gap.

I taught English ( Composition/American, British and World Literature as well as genre seminars: Drama/Poetry/Novel/Essay/Short Story) from 1975 until 1993. After that time my duties in education were writing grants, soliciting support, editing and publishing Alumni Newsletters, conducting prospect research and generally advocating for the mission of the schools that employed me.

Yesterday and today, I tried to keep six sections ( Physics/Environmental Science and Chemistry) of young men busy and teach them something.

My knowledge of science is as broad, deep and accurate as my knowledge of the Byzantine workings of the mind of Illinois House Speaker Mike Madigan - tabula rasa, kids, tabula rasa*!

I arrive at Leo (yesterday and today) at 6:15 A.M. and meet Mrs. Washington of GFS Food Services in the parking lot and walk with that lovely lady in through the venerable portals of Leo High School. Those gates to wisdom welcomed Dr. Steven Reid, M.D. who played football for Northwestern University and went on to design football helmets. General George Muellner -George K. Muellner President Advanced Systems Integrated Defense Systems George Muellner is president of Advanced Systems for the Integrated Defense Systems business unit of the Boeing Company, responsible for developing advanced cross-cutting concepts and technologies, and executing new programs prior to their reaching the System Design and Development. General Muellner developeed the STAR Defense Systems used in Desert Storm I & II.

I can not operate all the devices on my now obsolete Cingular One LG Phone and barely understand the concept of the balanced check book; nevertheless, I was a classroom teacher.

Yesterday, I learned that I was without lesson plans and teacher manuals. No sweat.

I dusted off Lord Bertrand Russell's History of Western Philsophy and discussed the Atomists of the 6th Century and handed out a one page study sheet on Heraclitus.

We talked about this quote attributed to Heraclitus:

Upon those who step into the same rivers, different and again different waters flow.

.

Flux - extreme flux. I stepped back into the river - it is still very wet, but boy them waters is differnt.

More at the end of the week.

I may post photos that the Gents take of me - curled in the fetal position and whimpering like a whipped wet kitty.


* Tabula rasa (Latin: blank slate) refers to the epistemological thesis that individuals are born without built-in mental content and that their knowledge comes from experience and perception.

New York Strangles the Puny Breath Out of Chicago - The Pump Room to be the Chump Room?

Photo -Stairway to Heaven (Sun-Times photo by Scott Stewart)

Maceys is Marshall Fields but they expect Chicagoans to buck-up for the Maple Room? It is awful by the way. The Day Marshall Fields fired every woman on the Christmas Frango Mint Massacre, I stopped tossing coin at the venerable store - it was owned by Canadians anyway. Then Macey's smugly boarded and looted the Flagship Store of Chicago.

Now, thanks to the great Dave Hoekstra ("You Ain't Much, If You Ain't Dutch")Chicagoans get a head's up on the latest Big Apple strangulation of a Chicago Icon - and I don't mean Carol Marin.

The Pump Room of the Ambassador East is going south. Did these eedjits ask Max Weismann? Angel the long-time barman? Businessman Steve Swederlow? Chop House Owner Joe Sullivan? Any of the hundreds of patrons who drop Hundred Dollar Bills on the bar, even though most prefer the swipe card? Nah.

My question - Did the Due Dillinger, er Dilligence Sub-Committee, bother to talk to staff or the the hundreds of patrons who gather in the Pump Room every weekend?

" Hi, I'm Ian Schrager! I could care less about you, your City, this pile of rocks, much less the Jumping Pump Room! Why don't you and your Hundo Stuffed Gold Coast Wallets take a hike? How's that question?"

January 4, 2010



BY DAVE HOEKSTRA Sun-Times Columnist


Chicago cabaret singer Nan Mason includes "One for My Baby (One More For the Road)" in her repertoire. Chances are Mason will include the Sinatra classic on Jan. 30 when she makes her final appearance at the legendary Pump Room bar and restaurant.


Mason's contract has not been renewed, and the restaurant is being downsized.


"Like other hotels in the Chicago area we've had to rethink our fine dining experience," said Paul Lauritsen, general manager of the Ambassador East, home of the Pump Room.


"Four- and five-diamond restaurants have had to rethink the public's willingness to go through with service and menu price in these economic times. The bar will remain open and we will feature a lighter bistro menu. There will be no seating in the main dining room."


It will sit empty except for special occasions.


The New York-based Ian Schrager Co. is bidding to buy the Ambassador East from the current owners, local developers Peter Dumon and David Bossy. Schrager is a co-founder of the Studio 54 nightclub in New York that revolutionized the late 1970s disco dance scene.


They did not sing "One for My Baby" at Studio 54.


The Pump Room opened on Oct. 1, 1938. It thrived on a celebrity culture that no longer exists.


Original owner Ernie Byfield recruited celebrities to sparkle in the dimly lit elegance of the Pump Room. Celebrites stayed over in Chicago for a day or two instead of rushing to a private jet. The late Sun-Times columnist Irv Kupcinet worked from Booth One in the 225-seat restaurant. The original Booth One is in storage at the Chicago History Museum .


The Pump Room had a declared style. Situated on the north end of Rush Street , once known as "the Street of Dreams," the Pump Room was a place where those dreams came true. Anyone could be like Bogie and Bacall, who stopped at the Pump Room en route to Hollywood the day after they wed in May 1945.


"Ernie invited Essee and me to join the Bogarts at table No. 1," Kupcinet recalled in his 1988 memoir Kup (A Man, An Era, A City). "What I remember best was the lovelight in the eyes of both Bogie and Baby."
The Pump Room could do that to you.


"The Ian Schrager plan is not a done deal yet," Lauritsen said. "I do know it is his intention to renovate the hotel and the Pump Room. We don't know if it still will be called the Pump Room."


A New York spokeswoman for Schrager had no comment.

Worth Democratic Committeman Candidate John O'Sullivan Draws Governor and Hundreds to Bourbon Street

This top-down was the only opportunity I had to take Governor Quinn's photo and for that I apologize - The Governor is a Class Act!


Governor Pat Quinn was welcomed to the southwest side like a Heavyweight Champion by Boxing Announcer Jack "Killer" Kilmartin! The Governor was a Champion for John O'Sullivan and offered a stirring endorsement of our candidate for Worth Township Democratic Committeeman.

Forrest Claypool travelled from the far North to introduce John O'Sullivan as a battler for honest and hard working government. Mr. Claypool noted that few Committeeman Candidates anywhere could inspire the confidence that drew hundreds of men and women to Bourbon Street, including Democratic Party Heavyweights.

My State Senator Ed Maloney was working the crowd hard for Johnny O'Sullivan and a real gentleman Joe Berrios, Cook County Commissioner and Candidate for Cook County Assessor talked with high school wrestling legendary coach Ron Oglesby and hundreds of other south side luminaries.

Kathy Meany of the Metropolitan Water Reclamation District represented Terry O'Brien, who came out to the neighborhood on Friday and Saturday to help John and Patty O'Sullivan.

Hundreds of Union People, School Teachers loudly applauded this great show of why the Democratic Party remains the force that the GOP never will understand.

People doing for other People. I almost never hear, " Hey I'm busy." Helots and "Underlings" are always willing to help their neighbors. Governor Pat Quinn proved that the bigger they are - the nicer they truly happen to be.

Thanks

Underlings? NYT Underling Dan MIHALOPOULOS Calls O'Brien Supporters Underlings?

Huge Hat Tip to Questian at Windy Citizen.com

Mr. O’Brien has support from many of the mayor’s underlings, particularly from the Northwest and Southwest Sides.

Underling? From the New York Times' Chicago News Cooperative - nice Lefty Progressive ring to that one.

under·ling (un′dər liŋ)noun
a person in a subordinate position; inferior: usually contemptuous or disparaging

You see Mayor Daley ain't backin' no one for the County Board President. He is going to ground for Ground Hogs Day ( February 2nd Primary Day By the Way!). He would have his pectorals in the Old Maytag Ringer! The Revs would go nuts; the Lake Shore Activists would do a Manger Scene in front of his 5th Floor Door; everyone else would shrug.


Toni Preckwinkle has no "Underlings" - she has . . .something, er other.

Dorothy Brown has no "Underlings" - she has retainers.


The New York Times recently picked up some cast off Chicago Tribune "Underlings" - Jim Warren - an MSNBC cast player for Chris "Milky" Matthews and Fat Boy Olbermann and the talented Mr. Dan Mihalopoulous.

"Underlings?" Oh, Danny - HENCHPERSONS at least!

Contemptuous and disparaging prose Danny Lad is the reason newspapers tanked. Keep that resume fresh son. Terry O'Brien will be fine.

White House Brennan Covers Napolitano - The Advent of Al Qaeda "Umer-Wear" Bombers Blowing the Britches off This Festive Season

Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab apparently assembled an explosive device, including 80 grams of Pentrite, or PETN, in the aircraft toilet of a Detroit-bound Northwest flight, then planned to detonate it with a syringe of chemicals. Passengers and crew subdued the suspect when he tried to set off the explosion. He succeeded only in starting a fire on himself.

Blammo! Billy Mays is doing the ground nap, or he could hawk Umar Undies for the Islamists. The Underwear that Blew the American Embassy Out of Yeman!

Poor John Brennan spent the end of the Holiday Season putting the panties back on the Obama White House:

White House aide John Brennan cited "lapses" and errors in the sharing of intelligence and clues about the Nigerian man accused in the foiled attempt.
"There is no smoking gun," Brennan said.

No Jack, only smoking Skivvies! There's more -

What we need to do as an intelligence community, as a government, is be able to bring those disparate bits and pieces of information together so we prevent Mr. Abdulmutallab from getting on the plane."
Brennan didn't say whether anyone is in line to be fired because of the oversights. He stood by Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano, although he acknowledged she has "taken some hits" for saying that the airline security system had worked. It didn't, and she clarified her remarks to show she meant that the system worked only after the attack was foiled, Brennan said.
He said the situation was not like before the attacks of Sept. 11, 2001, when intelligence agencies failed to share tips and information that might have uncovered the plot.
He said there "were no turf battles" between agencies. "There's no evidence whatsoever that any agency or department was reluctant to share" information.
Brennan appeared on "Fox News Sunday," CNN's "State of the Union," ABC's "This Week," and NBC's "Meet the Press."

The Amateur Hour White House!

2010 Christmas Carols for the Pschologically Challenged - Get the Jump on Next Yule

1. SCHIZOPHRENIA : Do You Hear What We Hear?

2. AMNESIA : I Don't Know If I'll Be Home for Christmas.

3. NARCISSIST : Hark the Herald Angels Sing-All About Me .
4. MANIC : Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Buses and Trucks and Trees and Fire Hydrants, and . . .

5. MULTIPLE PERSONALITY DISORDER : We Three Queens Disoriented Are.

6. PARANOID : Santa Claus Is Coming To Get Me.

7. BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER : Thoughts of Roasting on an Open Fire.

8. FULL PERSONALITY DISORDER : You Better Watch Out! I'm Gonna cry; I'm Gonna Pout! -- Maybe I'll Tell You Why .

9. OBSESSIVE COMPULSIVE DISORDER : Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells . . .

10. AGORAPHOBIA : I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day, but Wouldn't Leave My House..

11. SENILE DEMENTIA : Walking in a Winter Wonderland -- Miles from My House in My Slippers and Robe

12. OPPOSITIONAL DEFIANCE DISORDER : I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus...so I Burned Down the House.

13. SOCIAL ANXIETY DISORDER : Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas, While I Sit Here and Hyperventilate

14. ATTENTION DEFICIT DISORDER : We Wish You . . . Hey Look!!! It's Snowing!!!

Huge hat tip to Max Wesmann of the Center for the Study of Great Ideas

John O'Sullivan for Worth Township Democratic Committeeman: Join Us at Bourbon Street January 4th 6-9PM

John O'Sullivan is an Oak Lawn, Illinois family man and Union Man. John O'Sullivan is my choice for Worth Township Democratic Committeeman.

Join us January 4th at Bourbon Street 3359 West 115th Street -Merrionette Park, IL 60803-4556 (708) 388-8881.

$30 Donation and an Open Bar.

Close Yeman BUT Open Thomson to Al Qaeda ? - Former Governor Pat Quinn

Let's see: folks who objected to the move of terrorists from Gitmo to Thomson are 'fear-mongering NO-No's' and Dithering Dick Durbin and Pat Quinn are cool thoughtful statesmen - they are not covering the President's gluteus maximus -thin as it is.

"The local community is united in wanting to have this federal prison located in Thomson, Illinois," Quinn said.
Republicans criticized the plan for bringing terrorism suspects into the country despite questions over the legality of terms of their continued detention.

http://www.theroot.com/buzz/illinois-goes-gitmo-state-receive-guantanamo-detainees

Thomson, Illinois is going to get Gitmo terrorists, because the President Obama's debt to Daily Kos and Move-on.org knit-cap patriots was 'sick-nasty' smart last January.

However, Yeman's Embassy is closed, after Underwear Allah-boy got tuned-up by the brave passengers on the flight he was taking and bombing from Amsterdam to Detroit and Janet "Paulie Walnuts" Napolitano could not manage to blame the attack on Tea-Bagger Grannies and Swedes.

The U.S. closed its embassy in Yemen on Sunday, citing ongoing threats by the al Qaeda group linked to the failed Christmas Day bid to bomb a Detroit-bound flight.

"The U.S. Embassy in San'a is closed today, January 3, 2010, in response to ongoing threats by al-Qaida in the Arabian Peninsula ... to attack American interests in Yemen," the embassy said in a brief message on its Web site. The message did not say how long the embassy, which has been assaulted and threatened several times in the past decade, would remain closed.

“There are indications that Al Qaeda of the Arabian Peninsula is targeting our embassy and targeting our personnel. We’re not going to take any chance with the lives of diplomats,” White House Homeland Security and Counterterrorism Adviser John Brennan said on “Fox News Sunday.”

( click my post title)



Read more: http://www.politico.com/news/stories/0110/31109.html#ixzz0bZaSVWNg



Makes sense to MSNBC. Blame Rassmussen for the President's corkscrewing polls.'

Pat Quinn and, I hope,hope,hope, hope, Dithering Dick Durbin will be voted out of office for this slick political pay off to the President. Pat Quinn is a very nice man and Dick Durbin is a fatuous game-playing dope -in my Helot's Opinion.

Former Governor Pat Quinn's sleepover in Thomson is still on.


Here is the White House approval for Former Governor Pat Quinn's Al Qaeda Sleep-Over in Thomson, IL

December 15, 2009
The Honorable Pat Quinn
Governor of Illinois
Chicago, Illinois 60601
Dear Governor Quinn:
On January 22,2009, President Obama issued Executive Order 13492, directing the closure of the detention center at Guantanamo. A key purpose of this Order was to protect our national security and help our troops by removing a deadly recruiting tool from the hands of al-Qa'ida. This should not be a political or partisan issue. This action is supported by the nation's highest military and civilian leaders who prosecuted the war against al-Qa'ida under the previous administration and continue to do so today. It is also supported by five previous Secretaries of State who served in both Democratic and Republican administrations, including those of Presidents Nixon, Ford, George H.W. Bush, Clinton, and George W. Bush.
On November 12,2009, you wrote to Defense Secretary Robert Gates and Attorney General Eric Holder proposing that the Federal Government work with the State of Illinois to acquire the Thomson Correctional Center to house Federal inmates and a limited number of detainees from Guantanamo Bay, Cuba. We appreciate the leadership and assistance you and Senator Dick Durbin have provided during our evaluation of this proposal. We also would like to thank Thomson Village President Jerry "Duke" Hebeler and the people of Thomson and the surrounding region for their support and hospitality.
We write to inform you that the President has directed, with our unanimous support, that the Federal Government proceed with the acquisition of the facility in Thomson. Not only will this help address the urgent overcrowding problem at our nation's Federal prisons, but it will also help achieve our goal of closing the detention center at Guantanamo in a timely, secure, and lawful manner.
Executive Order 13492 directed us to close the detention facility at Guantanamo Bay and to conduct a review of the most secure and efficient way to adjudicate each of the Guantanamo detainee cases. This is part ofthe President's aggressive posture in the fight against al-Qa'ida that uses all instruments of our national power, including: keeping the pressure on al-Qa'ida and its leadership globally; strengthening homeland security and increasing cooperation and intelligence sharing among Federal agencies and between the Federal Government and state and local authorities; recognizing our values as a critical piece of our battle against our enemies; prosecuting detainees in Federal courts, which have safely and securely prosecuted terrorists for many years; trying detainees for violations of the law of war in military commissions, which were reformed by bipartisan legislation signed by the President in October; and transferring detainees to their home countries or third countries that agree to accept them, when consistent with our national security interests and humane treatment policies.
2
As the President has made clear, we will need to continue to detain some individuals currently held at the Guantanamo Bay detention facility. To securely house these detainees, Federal agencies plan to work with you and other state officials to acquire the nearly vacant maximum security facility in Thomson, Illinois. This facility will serve dual purposes. First, the Department of Justice will acquire this facility primarily to house Federal inmates. The Bureau of Prisons has a pressing need for more bed space in light of current crowded conditions. Second, the Defense Department will operate part of the facility to house a limited number of detainees from Guantanamo. The two parts of the facility will be managed separately, and Federal inmates will have no opportunity to interact with Guantanamo detainees. The security of the facility and the surrounding region is our paramount concern. The facility was built in 2001 to maximum security specifications, and after acquisition it will be enhanced to exceed perimeter security standards at the nation's only "supermax" prison in Florence, Colorado, where there has never been an escape or external attack. Federal departments and agencies, including the Departments of Homeland Security, Justice, and Defense, will work closely with state and local law enforcement authorities to identify and mitigate any risks, including sharing information through the state's "fusion center" and working with the Federal Joint Terrorism Task Force. The President has no intention of releasing any detainees in the United States. Current law effectively bars the release ofthe Guantanamo detainees on U.S. soil, and the Federal Government has broad authority under current law to detain individuals during removal proceedings and pending the execution of final removal orders. Federal officials also have consulted with local, county, and state law enforcement authorities to begin the process of identifying additional resources they may require to handle the increased population of Federal inmates and detainees. We are pleased that Illinois law enforcement authorities endorsed this plan in a letter to the Secretary of Defense and the Attorney General dated December 2,2009. We also note that more than 30 villages, towns, cities, counties, chambers of commerce, and other community and business organizations have sent letters, approved resolutions, or otherwise expressed their support for this plan. We are greatly encouraged by this support, and we commit to working with local authorities closely as this process moves forward. There are many steps still to be taken and many requirements still to be met, but we look forward to working with you to complete the Federal acquisition of the facility in Thomson. Sincerely,
4\\woR-o ~vv-~~
Hillary Rodham Clinton Secretary of State
~~~ecret81 of D@nse
3
Eric H. Holder, Jr. Attorney General
Janet Napolitano - Secretary of Homeland SecurityJanet Napolitano - Secretary of Homeland SecurityJanet Napolitano - Secretary of Homeland SecurityJanet Napolitano - Secretary of Homeland SecurityJanet Napolitano - Secretary of Homeland SecurityJanet Napolitano - Secretary of Homeland SecurityJanet Napolitano - Secretary of Homeland SecurityJanet Napolitano - Secretary of Homeland SecurityJanet Napolitano - Secretary of Homeland SecurityJanet Napolitano - Secretary of Homeland SecurityJanet Napolitano - Secretary of Homeland SecurityJanet Napolitano - Secretary of Homeland Security
Dennis C. Blair Director ofNational

Janet " Paulie Walnuts" Napolitano is really, really, really, really, really as much of a dope as Dithering Dick Durbin.

Sleep tight Mateys!

Sinatra and St. Francis DeSales - Anxiety? Remember April and Smile!

Reduction in force; Sub-Arctic temperatures and the wood of pews popping during 8:30 Mass; Peoples Gas bills' ComEd bills; Unemployed neighbors; Goofballs on the February 2nd Primary Ballots with better name placements than the qualified people; Kids with too much texting capacity and no communication skills; anxiety over the changes at work; Yemen becomes important all of a sudden and the kid down the block is deploying to Afghanistan - we'll be okay.

Read this:

Anxiety is the greatest evil that can befall a soul, except sin. God commands you to pray, but He forbids you to worry.

-- St. Francis de Sales

Click my post title and soak in some Sinatra - the lyrics could only have been written by a woman - and they were.

This lovely day will lengthen into evening, we'll sigh goodbye to all we ever had.
Alone where we have walked together, I'll remember April and be glad.
I'll be content you loved me once in April.
Your lips were warm and love and spring were new.
I'm not afraid of autumn and her sorrow, for I'll remember April and you.
The fire will dwindle into glowing ashes, for flames live such a little while.
I won't forget but I won't be lonely, I'll remember April and smile.

Music by Gene DePaul and lyrics by Patricia Johnston, and Don Raye

It will be a Happy New Year

Terry O'Brien and Bobby Douglas - Pros

I spent a great evening with about two hundred south side Chicago and Oak Lawn residents at the home of Oak Lawn commission candidate John O'Sullivan. The gathering welcomed Chicago Bears Great Bobby Douglas and Metropolitan Water Reclamation District President Terry O'Brien.

Bobby Douglas held the record as one of the greatest rushing quarterbacks in NFL history - In 1972 Bobby Douglas, out of Kansas and signed with the Bears in 1969, ran for 968 yards and 8 touchdowns on 141 carries. That record went unbroken until Mick Vick broke the string in 2006. Bobby Douglas amassed a career 2,040 yards rushing. Passing? Well, no one alive could hold onto to a ball thrown by Bobby Douglas. He was an Iron Man among Iron Men - hell, he took snaps from Mike Pyle. Bobby Douglas saw some real promise in the 2009 Bears and was very candid about the things that will bring about real change. Hard judgments and hard dollars can no longer be allowed to get tossed away. Which brings us to his appearance with my neighbors.

Bobby Douglas drove from Lake Forest to Oak Lawn John O'Sullivan's home, because he loves Chicago and the people who keep Chicago great. Bobby Douglas likes Terry O'Brien's style. The Bears need a Terry O'Brien-like manager. Bobby Douglas is a retired NFL Pro Football player, but here he was in the kitchen of a middle class working man who wants to make a difference in his community. Bobby Douglas and John O'Sullivan really hit it off. John O'Sullivan brought many friends to help Terry O'Brien and Bobby Douglas is a friend. There were also Local 399 engineers and their wives, 597 Pipe-fitters of both genders, Local 12 Carpenters, Electricians from Local 134, Operating Engineers of Local 150, school teachers, Sal, a retired City Colleges librarian, Terry Cox, an independent plumbing contractor, small business owners, postal workers, and a couple of candidates for elected office.

Prominent among these talented and thoughtful people was Terry O'Brien the twenty one year President of the fourth largest government agency in Illinois - The Metropolitan Water Reclamation District (MWRD)of Great Chicago.

MWRD formerly the Sanitary District is one of the engineering marvels of the world*.

I met Terry O'Brien for the first time. He is a solid guy and he lived up to my expectations. We voters get to know candidates only slightly, but the little I do know of Terry O'Brien is enough. He knows the job - it's mission and the operations that match the mission.

He is not a Sierra Club dilettante - he does not play at protecting the environment through policy papers and agendas. Terry O'Brien works at the job of protecting the citizens of Greater Chicago's lives with proper, scientific water treatment and sound engineering of waters. You will not see Terry O'Brien kayaking the Chicago River or preaching the gospel of Green. That is for the Brie nibblers to do. Chat on Public Radio and bully gutless editorial boards.

Terry O'Brien will manage Cook County Government, trim waste - treat it, consolidate and eliminate out-moded departments and treat taxpayers to genuine respect.

Terry said, "In 2008 alone, the MWRD refunded over $56 million to the residents of Cook County in tax abatements, and the MWRD has received an AAA bond rating from all three bond rating agencies. Since my election to the Board of Commissioners in 1988, the MWRD has seen no massive layoffs or unpaid vacation days. At the MWRD, I have worked hard to combine fiscally responsible policy with environmentally friendly initiatives. We have AAA ratings from all Three Bond agencies. Now, is the time for competent people in positions of Cook County Government based upon what they know and not who they know. We will cut the 1% tax. We will trim waste. We will manage Cook County Government."

Bobby Douglas recognizes a Pro. So do my neighbors. Come on out Saturday and meet Terry O'Brien. I'll hold the door open for you. Noon - Southwest Corridor/Southwest Burbs (3012 W. 111th St., Chicago, IL 60653)

*

The Metropolitan Water Reclamation District of Greater Chicago (District) is an independent government and taxing body encompassing approximately 91 percent of the land area and 98 percent of the assessed valuation of Cook County, Illinois.

The District is a separate legal entity sharing an overlapping tax base with the City of Chicago, the Chicago Board of Education, the Chicago School Finance Authority, the County of Cook, the Cook County Forest Preserve District, the Chicago Park District, the Chicago Public Building Commission, the Cook County Community College District, and various municipalities and school districts outside the City of Chicago but within the District’s boundaries.

The District was originally organized as the Sanitary District of Chicago in 1889 under an act of the Illinois General Assembly which has been modified from time to time to increase the District’s authority and jurisdiction. The enabling act in 1889 was in direct response to a long standing problem with contamination of the water supply and nuisance conditions of the rivers. The District reversed the flow of the Chicago and Calumet River Systems to stop the discharge of sewage to Lake Michigan and instead, discharge it to the Des Plaines River, where it could be diluted as it flowed into the Illinois River and eventually the Mississippi River. Prior to the District’s construction of a 61.3 mile system of canals and waterway improvements, the Chicago and Calumet River Systems were tributary to Lake Michigan. These river systems are now tributary to the Illinois River system.

From 1955 through 1988, the District was called The Metropolitan Sanitary District of Greater Chicago. In order to provide a more accurate perception of the District’s current functions and responsibilities, the name was changed effective, January 1, 1989, to Metropolitan Water Reclamation District of Greater Chicago.

http://www.mwrd.org/irj/portal/anonymous?NavigationTarget=navurl://138bf9fb3cd95634e37c28ef50eccef1

Salon's Blubbery Joan Walsh Wants You to Know That She Is Outraged - Outraged

Getting Showered and Shaved a bit ago, in order to attend to local Democratic Party functions ( good people one and all and nothing like the National Nitwits of the DNC) my son Conor was power surfing the cable and left on MSNBC, before heading to the door and work at Di Cola's Fish on Western Ave.

As I completed my wardrobe assessment for the evening Tweed Ride - frock, shirt and collar cravat, sword-cane and Churchill Waterproof, I noticed that damn his eyes - the lad had left the station tuned to MSNBC.

Salon's Joan Walsh, plumped up from the Holiday Feasting and appearing to have gone 'Double Dutch' with the Mashed Spuds ladles, was rehowling her morning's 'Props' to the Commander-in-Chief with MSNBC Meathead and resident flannel-mouth Chris Matthews. Joan and Milky were doing "the dozens" on the cross-eyed, Black Dude who sounds like steam escaping - the guy had worked for Dick Cheney. MSNBC always invites Republican or Blue Dog Democrat Victims -as opposed to guests.

In essence, Plump and ever weepy Joan had this to say:

" President Obama's candor Tuesday describing the mosaic of warnings . . ." . . . that's enough.

Keep Napolitano - Desiree Rogers Might be our Next Homeland Security Diva!

I read Christine Flowers, Philly Lawyer and syndicated columnist, give a sober assesment of Janet Napolitano's Holiday Screwed Pooch - the Nigerian Security Gate-crasher who tried to murder 250 people on a flight from Amsterdam to the Good Old U.S.A.

First came Janet Reno, the Clinton attorney general who helped set the fire at Waco (with some help from the ATF) and had trouble with an illegal Elian.

But as wacky as she was (wrestling with crocs, both real and rhetorical), she looks positively competent compared to Janet Napolitano, the Obama administration head of homeland security who declared in the wake of the foiled terror attack on Christmas Day that "the system worked really very, very smoothly." (She also oversaw a report that equated political opponents of President Obama and some veterans with terrorists and hate groups. Apparently, she has a tenuous grip on reality.)

( click my post title)

I shiver with the notion that the Amatuer Hour White House might force the resignation of DHS Czarina who looks like Paulie Walnuts on The Sopranos and replace her with an experienced hand at handling Gate Crashers - Desiree Rogers.

"Lots of people just come anyways," she said. "They won't take no for an answer. Finally, I just said, 'All right, come on in. It's no use kicking you out.' " Desiree Rogers

http://hickeysite.blogspot.com/2009/12/new-york-post-quotes-desiree-rogers-all.html


http://www.npr.org/blogs/tellmemore/2009/12/desiree_rogers_social_secretar.html?ft=1&f=6831923

"Obama seemed like an avatar of modernity" -Crazy Aunt Maureen Dowd with Buyer's Remorse

Dang! A friend of mine bought a new Saturn several weeks ago and learned through an oafish associate - "Hey, you bought too soon! Saturn is knocking off Seven Grand to clear stock!"

Thanks so Mucking Fuch! In this case, who knew?

Had the buyer but known! The Saturn's a nice car. At least it runs. Sometimes we buy a shiny new flivver and it is a real pig. It is still your heap. Did you take it out for a spin? Read up on it? Kick the tires? Pop the hood? Those things you could have done and avoided some heart ache.

You buy it and you live with it. Thus, so with our elected officials. They come to us from the political showroom shiny and swell smelling and then whammo! They're pigs, dogs, lemons, less than we expected, not up to snuff and bum deals.

We all experience that. That is called life. Maureen Dowd, the Irish spinster who seems like the Crazy Aunt Mo that every family seems to own, is beefing today that President Obama is her Saturn, Yugo, Pinto, Opal Hatch-back. ( click me post title for Maureen Dowd's hissy fit!)

Citing the attempt of the Nigerian’s father to warn U.S. authorities six months ago, the president intoned: “It now appears that weeks ago this information was passed to a component of our intelligence community but was not effectively distributed so as to get the suspect’s name on a no-fly list.”

In his detached way, Spock was letting us know that our besieged starship was not speeding into a safer new future, and that we still have to be scared.

Heck of a job, Barry.

Heck, Maureen! You never kicked the tires, let alone popped the hood on this one! President Obama is the same guy you and most of America embraced as the Avatar of Modernity! He is as new as he was when he announced his candidacy on that blustery day in Springfield - a back benching short term Illinois State Senator with an invisible resume.

Nothing shocking. Especially that sticker shock. President Obama has all the knocks and pings that keep his Administration in neutral, but he still has that swell showroom scent.

President Obama is Our President and we own him. Now, deal with it.

Happy New Year! Happy and Productive and Above All Else Safe in 2009 and 2010!

May This New Year Bring all of us Happiness, Fulfillment, Prosperity ( remember that one), and, God Help Us, Peace.

God gave us another 365 days to do all that we are meant to do. That is a Blessing!

God Bless You All!

This great faux Edwardian Chap comes fro Max Weismann of the Center for the Study of Great Ideas! Happy New Year, Max - and all the Gang at the Jumping Pump Room!

"A Solid Rumor " from a Solid Softball- Andy Martin- Trigona-Atchison-Topeka and the Santa Fe

Mark Kirk is not my cup of tea. I don't drink tea. I like coffee from Kean Gas on 111th & Talman. Mark Kirk is not my congressman, but he smugly voted for the Cap * Trade ( Markey/Waxman) and was the Republican cupcake who floated that idiotic bill over the fence. Mark Kirk wants to replace Roland Burris.

Jimmy the two-headed boy could replace Roland Burris, but that is another Graphic Novel ( comic book) entirely.

Andy Martin ( the legendary 'String Any Cognomen Together' Martin-Trigona -Shoo Fly Pie) is Illinois' Deluxe Annual Edition Comic Edition* This whey-faced mope** is nuttier than a Stuckey's Log. Andy Martin wants to replace Roland Burris.

Andy Martin is telling everyone that Mark Kirk is Gay - not gleeful, jovial, glad, joyous, happy, cheerful, sprightly, blithe, airy, light-hearted; vivacious, frolicsome, sportive, hilarious, but homosexual. He bases this on "Solid Rumor!"

There's Gold in the Kankakee River Bayou at the Warner Bridge Road! Sell the house and get to panning!

A Solid Rumor that a guy is Gay?

Who Shives A Git?

I could care less if George Washington or Gertrude Stein were Homosexual - I am 50% right on that one. One historical figure is the Father of Our Country. Metaphorically speaking a dedicated Homosexual could be the "Father of Our Country." A heterosexual no matter how energetic or lascivious could not, in fact be, the literal "Father of Our Country."

An elected official works to serve the will of the people who elected her, or him.

Mark Kirk violated that one with his vote on the Markey/Waxman bill. Out he must go.

Outed? That is the man's own business. Gay or Straight? Das macht nicht!

Andy Martin is a goof. There are many goofs in public life. Gee, you think, Hickey? Yep.

A Gay public official not bound to GLBT Agenda Doctrine would have my vote. Just as a heterosexual Boiled Beets Progressive Doofus would certainly not have that vote.


Vote for a good steward. I will vote for Patrick Hughes. I am a Democrat, but Alexi Giannoulias and Dave Hoffman have too many goofs in their corners.





*A comic book annual customarily has a larger page count than its monthly counterpart, leaving room for longer single stories, multiple stories in a single annual, and/or "extra" material that the monthly series lacks the space to publish. These "extras" may include biographical information on featured characters, full-page pin-ups of characters, reprints of previously published material, or all-new short stories (often called "back-up" stories). An annual as a whole was once considered an "extra" in itself, providing story material in addition to the customary twelve issues per year of a monthly series.

**

The Illinois Republican Party released a statement condemning Martin and his ad.

"His statements today are consistent with his history of bizarre behavior and often times hate-filled speech, which has no place in the Illinois Republican Party," the statement said. "Mr. Martin will no longer be recognized as a legitimate Republican Candidate by the Illinois Republican Party."

Martin, who has run for political office several times, was convicted of attacking two photographers in Florida, CBS 2 Chicago reports, and was denied admission to the Illinois Bar for "moderately severe character defect." He reportedly once ran for Congress to "eliminate Jew power in America."

In a bid for the presidency in 1999, Martin ran a television ad in New Hampshire contending that his opponent George W. Bush "had a cocaine problem" and suffered from "alcohol abuse," the Chicago Tribune reports. He also reportedly attacked Barack Obama in the 2008 presidential election, claiming he is a Muslim and questioning whether he is a U.S. citizen.

Kirk's office released a statement calling Martin's claims "untrue and demeaning to the political process," CBS 2 reports. Jacob Meister, an openly gay candidate for the Democratic Senate nomination reportedly called the ad reminiscent of McCarthy-era tactics and said it could damage Kirk's military career. Kirk is on active duty as a Naval Intelligence officer.

Andy Martin is So Gay. The Beggar's Opera Falls Flatish

"Kirk has surrounded himself with homosexuals." Heavens! Sparks of Flint!- Hell, had I surrounded myself with homosexuals, I'd have a better diet, less robust a waistline, a snappier arsenal of witty bon mots, more a sense of fabric and design, a better lawn, a least some garden and a better ear for vocal jazz.


Boys and Girls, the following Ballad Opera fully explains why I am not nor can ever be a Republican ,yet one who can fully appreciate and reflect manfully on the life Corinthian! Gay shmay! Kirque, Gay or Straight, is, in my Helot's point of view, a thorough going fraud, jape, howler, sidesplitter, thigh-slapper, wow, belly laugh, riot, scream -and Andy ( add a list of nomenclatures and pronouns) a litigous gag line, punch line, tag line, laugh line,blue joke, blue story, dirty joke, dirty story teller and snitch.

Now, Ladies and JanTell Muhn! Our Opera!

Ditty one -"Can Love Be Controlled By Advice?" by John Gay

The Scene: We are in the home of Peachum ( Andy Martin), a supposedly respectable businessman who actually fences stolen goods for professional thieves. He and Mrs. Peachum (Intercahngeable as are the cloths they affect) have just discovered that their daughter Polly ( Rep. Marque Kirque) has secretly married the infamous highwayman Captain Macheath, who is not present. Nor is he ever. (Note the contemptuous way that Mrs. Peachum dismisses the nobility, saying that a "Lord" is no better a husband than a thief).

MRS. PEACHUM: Played by Andrew Elton Olivia Newton John Martin Les Paul and Mary Ford Dewey Cheatum and Howe Trigona.

OUR POLLY IS A SAD SLUT!
NOR HEEDS WHAT WE HAVE TAUGHT HER.
I WONDER ANY MAN ALIVE
WILL EVER REAR A DAUGHTER.
FOR SHE MUST HAVE
BOTH HOOPS AND GOWNS
AND HOODS TO SWELL HER PRIDE,
WITH SCARFS AND STAYS
AND GLOVES AND LACE,
AND SHE WILL HAVE MEN BESIDE;
AND WHEN SHE'S DRESSED
WITH CARE AND COST,
ALL-TEMPTING FINE AND GAY,
AS MEN SHOULD SERVE A COWCUMBER,
SHE FLINGS HERSELF AWAY.

POLLY: Played by Rep. Marque Kirque

CAN LOVE BE CONTROLLED BY ADVICE?
WILL CUPID OUR MOTHERS OBEY?
THOUGH MY HEART
WERE AS FROZEN AS ICE,
AT HIS FLAME
'TWOULD HAVE MELTED AWAY.
WHEN HE KISSED ME
SO CLOSELY HE PRESSED,
'TWAS SO SWEET
THAT I MUST HAVE COMPLIED:
SO I THOUGHT IT
BOTH SAFEST AND BEST
TO MARRY,
FOR FEAR YOU SHOULD CHIDE.

Sing it Girls!