Showing posts sorted by relevance for query houlihan. Sort by date Show all posts
Showing posts sorted by relevance for query houlihan. Sort by date Show all posts

Friday, December 05, 2008

Get on the Mike Houlihan Holiday Highway!


Chicago Renaissance Man Mike Houlihan is all over the Town - bringing Joy to Child-like Male of Arrested Development and 16 Year Old Instincts like your Humbel Servant.

Get thee to Houli! Anon! With dispatch! All Due Haste! Immediately -if not sooner!

Get the Author's John Henry with a copy of Hooliganism:
Hooliganism

Book Summary

Buy the Book Now! HOOLIGANISM is an anthology of Mike Houlihan’s best columns from The Irish American News, with additional material from the Chicago Tribune Magazine, and Chicago Public Radio. This book captures the best stories from one of Irish America’s funniest raconteurs. Houlihan takes the reader on a picaresque journey as he recounts his travels in show biz as a Shakespearian clown; his days as proprietor of The Hooley-Dooley, an Irish gin mill in Rockaway Beach, NY; his adventures as a theatre and film producer chasing investors; memories of growing up Irish-Catholic on the south side of Chicago; and his day to day tightrope walk as an itinerant actor, father, and husband. Hooliganism also revisits and reinvents several Irish American urban myths and fables featuring a stock company of rogues, scoundrels, and boozers. Funny stuff in ten-minute installments.

Filled with Irish jokes, anecdotes, and preposterous tales, this book is like enjoying a pint of your favorite stout. If you read the whole thing in one sitting you’ll be drunk with laughter. Best to take it slow, one at a time and savor the enjoyment, chuckles, and eccentric wit of Mike Houlihan. The anthology covers the very best of Mike’s stories from 1993-2008, featuring the same friendly style that the Chicago Tribune called, “A natural storyteller’s flair.” The Wednesday Journal said, “Mike Houlihan has been telling stories for a long time…on Broadway, in feature films and on TV.” For six years Mike Houlihan sold out theatres with his one man comic memoir of growing up Irish, GOIN’ EAST ON ASHLAND. Now that same genie has been released from the bottle into this book.

Mike Houlihan is a former features columnist for the Chicago Sun-Times. He began writing the “Hooliganism” column in the Irish American News in 1996 and has since become the comic mainstay for the newspaper. Mike’s no holds barred take on life has entertained as well as outraged readers of the Irish newspaper. Mike began his career as an actor and then writer of plays and films. His memories of growing up as the seventh child in an Irish American Catholic family on the south side of Chicago and his wickedly wacky imagination create an alchemy of funny stories. The Sun-Times said, “Fasten your seatbelts… it’s terrific entertainment. The blarney-blessed author is Chicago’s largest and loudest leprechaun with a universal, nostalgic appeal. He grabs his audience ina warm bear hug and never let’s go.” The Daily Southtown agreed, “Houlilhan’s stories will keep many Irish eyes smiling!



December's Hooliganism Schedule of Events
Meet Mike Houlihan and enjoy this holiday season with some cheer and
the book Hooliganism at these following locations.

Sunday, Dec. 7th, 2:00 PM
Irish American Heritage Center
4626 North Knox
Chicago, IL
773-282-7035

Wed. Dec. 10th. 7-9 PM
Claddagh Ring Pub
2306 West Foster
Chicago
773-271-4794

Sunday, Dec. 14th,
Gaelic Park
6119 W. 147th Street, Oak Forest
Immediately following 10AM mass & breakfast
708-687-9323

Additional Dates to Come.




Contact us for further infromation on upcoming events.
phone: 312-431-8700

Monday, November 30, 2009

Salahis Attempted to Crash Cleek Club Chicago - I Wanted to Let the Blond In, But Houli Said "Nix on the Twist!"




Bill Zwecker notes the attempts by the Couple Salahi tp gain entre to the Midwest Polo Club - that used to trot out the chukkas for pukka at the Old Chicago National Guard Armory on Chicago Ave. a few semesters back.

Unreported - until this very moment - was the attempt by Michaele and Tareq Salahi to be admitted to the posh and exclusive (membership two -three pending: once Beachwood Reporter's Steve Rhodes pays his downstroke of a twelve pack of Drewry's Beer) Cleek Club of Chicago.

Readers ( Mom and that guy in Toledo) might recall that following an ugly incident at Chicago' Union League Club that film auteur, raconteur and libertine Mike Houlihan* and I formed the Cleek of Chicago - Gentleman's Club (No Lap Dancing and No Laplanders)
http://hickeysite.blogspot.com/2007/12/mike-houlihan-and-files-of-cleek-club.html


Some weeks ago, following Cleek's Kangaroo Boxing Night and Oyster Dinner, Chicago Renaissance Man Mike Houlihan and Myself were enjoying our post-prandial tonsil wettings of brandies ( E&J of Course!) in our tall-backed overly stuffed Baker Chairs and damning the eyes of the Pathan Thuggee over their latest devilment and afront to Our President, when Worthington bowed - presidential I might add - and announced that a striking blond woman and tuxedoed gent were at the front-door.

Houli, sound chap, asked Worthingon to pass the silver salver and "Let's have a screw at the Chappy's card. What?"

Worthington announced that the two-some had not offered their card.

"No Card? They could be the damned Press, Worthington! Only a thoroughgoing skunk and scoundrel of the First Order would deem himself presentable sans ecart entre

I saw that Worthington was deeply troubled by this oversight, as he is generally quite good at his job. Worthington is no Desiree Rogers. Her resume got not a glance here at Club Cleek. I offered, " Don't trouble yourself Worthington on this score. Mr. Houlihan would demand to see Pope Ben's damned card and check it for the Union Bug before he even considered talking to its owner."

"True!"

"Houli, Old Son, should we not give the two the once over as Cleek overhead demands at least one more member and Brother Rhodes, taken up with Porcine Ague or some such botheration, is delinquent on the golden nectar brewed in South Bend, Indiana; Bottled Ambrosia **sporting the ruggedly handsome and reassuring Mountie!"

"No, Hickey. No Card; No Chat; No Chat; No Cleek! Standards Man! This is not an igloo or some tent on a lawn! Ecart entre connaissance et usage d'une langue minoritaire : essai de typologie des facteurs. Le cas de la langue basque! This is Cleek of Chicago!"

" What's the blond Crumpet wearing Worthington?"

" Quiet fetching, Sir and might I add that she is wearing a wanton and roguish smirk that . . .

Houli howled, "I would not care a jot if she were wearing a gown made up of Benjamins, Hickey!"

" Standards?"

" They ain't just tunes by Sinatra, my boy!"

" Quite right, Houli! Worthington, two more E & J's *** and a brace of Olde English 40's . . .What? What?"

" Oh, I dare say, Hickey Old Cock, might not be a good idea -mind you. Those are two toned chino slacks you are wearing?"

"God's Tripes!"

*Chicago Television Premiere of“Tapioca”
On WTTW
WTTW, Channel 11, willpresent the television premiere of Mike Houlihan’s independent feature film,Tapioca, on Saturday night/Sunday AM December 19th at 12:30AM.

Tapioca stars Emmy and Tonywinner Ben Vereen along with Mike Houlihan and his entire family andfriends. In a story as timely as The GreatRecession of 2009, abrasive blowhard Pipes McGonnigle (Houlihan), a TV hawkerfor a Chicago car dealership, loses his job, gets kicked out by his wife, andruns afoul of a Streetwise vendor (Vereen) with supernatural powers, whoconsigns him to life as a bum by way of a hex. Former Sun-Times columnistHoulihan expanded his stand-up act of the same title and cast a host of veteranChicago actors for this comic allegory of redemption set entirely in thegrittiest of urban locations.

Tapioca features SaturdayNight Live alum Tim Kazurinsky, Greg Hollimon from “Strangers With Candy”, MarkBorchardt from “American Movie”, as well as Jimmy Carrane, David Pasquesi, PaulKelly, Michael McNeal, Jack McCabe, and several other Second City veterans.Mary Carney of “Ryan’s Hope” is also featured as a mystical bag lady.

The film premieredtheatrically at the Park City Film Music Festival in Park City, Utah in 2008.Tapioca features an original score by Chicago jazz composer Ryan Cohan andcontributions from Gospel legends Otis Clay and Lena McLin. PulitzerPrize winning political cartoonist Jack Higgins designed cartoons for theflick. Paddy Houlihan directed the film and William Houlihan executiveproduced.

The Houlihans have screenedTapioca at The Texas Black Film Festival, First Take Film Festival, The OtherVenice Film Festival, and won Best Feature Film at the Geneva Film Fest.Vanguard Cinema has placed Tapioca in worldwide DVD distribution. Mike says,“Tapioca is proof that you don’t need a million dollars to make a cool littlemovie.”

Dan Soles, WTTW Program Director,said, “Tapioca spins a fresh Scrooge, an apt Chicago comedy for our Christmaspresent.”


**"First Case of Drewrys Ale Goes to Roosevelt
One Carload Shipped to Lima Today

President Roosevelt is to get first case of Drewrys Canadian Ale to be brewed in the United States. This is not done merely by way of advertising. Drewrys is the first Canadian Ale to be produced in America and it it fitting that the President who made this possible should be recognized by this feature.

The story back of this gesture may be interesting even to the President himself. Over six months before Mr. Roosevelt was elected, Mr. M. J. Black, the President of Drewrys Ltd. of Canada and representative of various English interests abroad, came down to the States with his mind decided that Roosevelt would be elected and that the sale of malt beverages would be permitted again, and backed his judgment with his company's capital.

It soon became evident, however, that an American company was necessary to operate on American soil. Therefore the Drewrys Limited. U. S. A., was formed and enfranchised and fully financed within itself. And this American Company after a most careful survey of the brewing facilities of America, formed its affiliation with The Sterling Brewers of Evansville, Indiana, whose long record of cleanly, careful, wholesome brewing measured up well to the Canadian standard of Drewry quality. Evansville immediately put in its fermenters and aging tanks. The Drewry Ale brewed according to the Canadian standards, where, also according to the Canadian standards, it has been aging and mellowing in since. It Is now ready at long last.

One carload will arrive here for you tomorrow. Their distribution to your various good dealers will follow immediately and by the day after tomorrow it ought to be ready for you. The Lima Beverage Co. No. Main St. Main 2171 Distributor DREWRYS ALE SINCE 1877" - Lima (Ohio) News, Aug 15, 1933



***E & J Brandy Review - absolutely ripping!

Alcohol: 80 Proof (40% alcohol by volume)

Color: Dark copper.

Aroma: Sweet nose, like Belgian candy sugar, surprisingly mild aroma. Very inviting smell.

Flavor: Bites like a bugger. Makes you wince. This first thing this brandy does when it hits your palate is that it digs-in and attacks your sensitive mucous membranes with a pungent, hot, and oily mouth attack. Finishes with a hint of cashew nut and a sharp, strong, flower-petal flavor smack. A unique flavor profile that would be interesting and even appreciated if this brandy didn't burn so much initially.


http://www.epinions.com/content_2361696388

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Friday Night Feature With Mike Houlihan -Tapioca at Beverly Arts Center May 22nd



'I took my gal to the picture shows and pleasure I was seekin'/I went for her mouth, but kissed her nose and the Goddam thing was Leakin'!'

The art of the Friday Night Show with your best honey is lost on America, given the sorry state of CinaPlex Movie Ikeas. However, you and your Steady Betty can link arms and glide to the Beverly Arts Center and thrill to Renaissance Man Mike Houlihan's Comic Opus Tapioca.

Beverly Arts Center
2407 W. 111th St.
Chicago, IL 60655
773-445-3838
www.beverlyartcenter.org

Contact: Grace Kuikman, 773-213-7531 or grace@beverlyartcenter.org

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Beverly Art Center to Screen Mike Houlihan's Indie Film 'Tapioca'

(CHICAGO, Apr. 29, 2009) -- Emmy and Tony Award winner Ben Vereen and Saturday Night Live alum Tim Kazurinsky headline a Chicago cast of comic characters in Mike Houlihan's independent feature film "Tapioca," screening at the Beverly Arts Center, 2407 W. 111th St., Chicago, on Friday, May 22, 8 p.m.
The film also features Second City veterans Greg Hollimon, Jimmy Carrane, David Pasquesi, as well as the entire Houlihan family. The screening marks a homecoming for many of the cast members. Back in March of 2004 the Houlihans presented their "sketch comedy experiment" on stage at the Beverly Arts Center. "The stage show was the mustard seed which became this independent feature film," Houlihan said. Most of the performers from the show have roles in the film.
"Tapioca" the movie premiered in Park City, Utah during the 2008 Sundance Film Festival and was also screened at the Texas Black Film Festival, First Take Film Fest, and The Other Venice Film Festival. It won "Best Feature Film" at the Geneva Film Festival.
The film features an original score by Chicago jazz composer Ryan Cohan, with additional music from Gospel legends Lena McLin and Otis Clay, as well as cartoons by Chicago Sun-Times Pulitzer Prize-winning political cartoonist Jack Higgins.
Titled for the Chicago slang for being broke, "Tapioca" tells the story of Pipes McGonnigle (Mike Houlihan), a bigoted blowhard who makes the mistake of abusing a Streetwise vendor named Nuts (Ben Vereen). Nuts puts a hex on Pipes, rendering him homeless and turning his world upside down.
Local performers featured in the film include comedians Paul Kelly and Bill Brady, John Spellman, Frank Moran, and rapper E.J. Hott. The film was shot at locations around the south side including the Cork & Kerry Tavern, St. Margaret of Scotland Church and the Barrel of Laughs comedy club.
Tickets for the May 22, 8 p.m. BAC screening of "Tapioca" are $7 ($5 for Beverly Arts Center members). Cast members will be on hand for discussion and a reception after screening. For tickets call the BAC box office, 773-445-3838.


For more information visit www.TapiocaTheMovie.com or www.mikehoulihan.com.

Monday, October 18, 2010

Mike Houlihan's Latest Film -Her Majesty 'Da Queen World Premiere November 13th at IAHC



If there are any flies on Mike Houlihan, they must be pretty active wee lads! Mike Houlihan hustles like a 70's Disco King. The man is a prodigy. His lastest film "Her Majesty 'da Queen" World Premiere is coming to Chicago's Irish American Heritage Center.

Mike Houlihan's Newest Film to Première at IAHC

The Irish American Heritage Center will host the world premiere of Mike Houlihan's new documentary "Her Majesty, 'da Queen" on Saturday night, November 13th at 7:30PM.

The film is a sneak peek backstage at the annual St. Patrick's Day Parade Queen Contest and captures all the humor, heartbreak, and excitement shared by over 100 young women each year as they vie for the crown. Many of Chicago's most endearing Irish-American personalities are also featured in the film in intimate interviews during the pageant.

"Her Majesty, 'da Queen" was edited from video shot at both the 2009 and 2010 queen contests. This one-hour program is a prologue to Mike Houlihan's epic documentary "Our Irish Cousins", which is currently in post-production. "Cousins" was shot all over the US and in Ireland and reveals the Irish American experience in all it's glory, humor, and sprit.

The screening of "Her Majesty, 'da Queen" will begin at 7:30PM with introductory remarks by filmmaker Mike Houlihan and finish up with a Q&A with the audience and a post-screening party in the Fifth Province. Pub.

The Irish American Heritage Center is located in Chicago at 4626 North Knox with free parking available. For more information call 773-282-7035.


Houlie moves like a Kenyan at a Marathon.

Sunday, November 11, 2007

Chicago's Club of the UnClubbable




Above - Mycroft Holmes - Below Mike Houlihan in manly Pre-Labor Day Panama tan suit gives a stern temperance lecture to an obviously clubbable and reed thin chap at a charitable event. Absent from this charitable event were members of Chicago's Union League Club.


Mycroft and Sherlock Holmes, the talented and cerebral sons of Bob and Tess Holmes, coal carters from Yorkshire, remind me of Mike Houlihan: Like Mycroft, Mike Houlihan is cerebral, philosophical and poetic:Mike Houlihan - Author, Actor, Playwright, Film Director, Columnist, Patriot, Wit, Gadabout, Free-Spender, Arch-Goodguy, Pugilist, Censor.

Like Mycroft given to deep thought to the point of ennui:

...he has no ambition and no energy. He will not even go out of his way to verify his own solutions, and would rather be considered wrong than take the trouble to prove himself right. Again and again I have taken a problem to him, and have received an explanation which has afterwards proved to be the correct one. And yet he was absolutely incapable of working out the practical points...

– Sherlock Holmes, speaking of his brother in "The Adventure of the Greek Interpreter"
From our friends at Wikpedia

And yet like Sherlock (- Ratiocinator extraordinaire, dope fiend, tobacconist, actor par excellence, musician, grifter, and wower of hot chicks) a man of the world, .

Houli is a complex man of universal tastes and inclinations - at once private and thoughtful and concurrently a Rabelaisian Rounder of the First Order.

Mike Houlihan,an 18th Century man of Johnsonian ( Samuel Johnson ) exertions and talents trapped in a faux-Edwardian world of stuffed shirts and phonies.

Houli got clubbed by the membership committee of the Union League Club - a dusty and pretentious convention center for low-brows with American Express Gold Cards. He was deemed 'unclubbale' - to use Dr. Johnson's 18th Century coinage. His heartache cried up to dry our eyes from the pulpy pages of Cliff Carlson's Irish American Magazine and made them moist with brotherly understanding - Page 28 - click my post title for the link:

Here is a poignant passage:

Of course I’m happy now that I
couldn’t join their club. Who wants
to go where they’re not wanted? But
these schmucks wouldn’t even put it in
writing, no letter, just the word passed
on to me, “Sorry you’re not our kind
darling.”
It’s all for the best. I couldn’t afford
it now anyway. However I would suggest
they remove the word “Chicago”
from their moniker at the Union League
Club. As Eddie Vrdolyak once said, “In
Chicago, we don’t stab you in the back,
we stab you in the front!” Well not
these guys.
So I will take pride in their snub and
remember my mother’s words “the bitter
lesson is best taught”. It’s what I got for
sticking my nose into a wasps nest.
Of course I forgive them and even
though I may announce to the world that
the Union League Club can kiss my fat
Irish ass, I’m actually, in my own way,
just turning the other cheek


Christian Gentleman to the backbone!

Houli, My Dear Fellow, a man of your expanded worth should not be confined, much less defined by a membership. You do more in a day than most of the Union League Club's overpaid ambulance chasers in two-tone broadcloth $400 shirts do a lifetime.

Who was it that said 'Study everything; join nothing?'

Mike Houlihan's Giant's eyes take in the cant and hypocrisy of our world right here in Chicago. This man is not Clubbable? Pish Posh!

Houli, enact a Club without Walls; found an Association without a Membership Committee. Make it an open membership to whomever you have the grace with whom you deign to congress.

To the phonies, snobs, louts, boors, tightwads - you might be unclubbable.

Tuesday, August 25, 2015

Chicago's Club of the UnClubbable

  




Above - Mycroft Holmes - Below Mike Houlihan in manly Pre-Labor Day Panama tan suit gives a stern temperance lecture to an obviously clubbable and reed thin chap at a charitable event. Absent from this charitable event were members of Chicago's Union League Club.


Mycroft and Sherlock Holmes, the talented and cerebral sons of Bob and Tess Holmes, coal carters from Yorkshire, remind me of Mike Houlihan: Like Mycroft, Mike Houlihan is cerebral, philosophical and poetic:Mike Houlihan - Author, Actor, Playwright, Film Director, Columnist, Patriot, Wit, Gadabout, Free-Spender, Arch-Goodguy, Pugilist, Censor.

Like Mycroft given to deep thought to the point of ennui:

...he has no ambition and no energy. He will not even go out of his way to verify his own solutions, and would rather be considered wrong than take the trouble to prove himself right. Again and again I have taken a problem to him, and have received an explanation which has afterwards proved to be the correct one. And yet he was absolutely incapable of working out the practical points...

– Sherlock Holmes, speaking of his brother in "The Adventure of the Greek Interpreter"
From our friends at Wikpedia

And yet like Sherlock (- Ratiocinator extraordinaire, dope fiend, tobacconist, actor par excellence, musician, grifter, and wower of hot chicks) a man of the world, .

Houli is a complex man of universal tastes and inclinations - at once private and thoughtful and concurrently a Rabelaisian Rounder of the First Order.

Mike Houlihan,an 18th Century man of Johnsonian ( Samuel Johnson ) exertions and talents trapped in a faux-Edwardian world of stuffed shirts and phonies.

Houli got clubbed by the membership committee of the Union League Club - a dusty and pretentious convention center for low-brows with American Express Gold Cards. He was deemed 'unclubbale' - to use Dr. Johnson's 18th Century coinage. His heartache cried up to dry our eyes from the pulpy pages of Cliff Carlson's Irish American Magazine and made them moist with brotherly understanding - Page 28 - click my post title for the link:

Here is a poignant passage:

Of course I’m happy now that I
couldn’t join their club. Who wants
to go where they’re not wanted? But
these schmucks wouldn’t even put it in
writing, no letter, just the word passed
on to me, “Sorry you’re not our kind
darling.”
It’s all for the best. I couldn’t afford
it now anyway. However I would suggest
they remove the word “Chicago”
from their moniker at the Union League
Club. As Eddie Vrdolyak once said, “In
Chicago, we don’t stab you in the back,
we stab you in the front!” Well not
these guys.
So I will take pride in their snub and
remember my mother’s words “the bitter
lesson is best taught”. It’s what I got for
sticking my nose into a wasps nest.
Of course I forgive them and even
though I may announce to the world that
the Union League Club can kiss my fat
Irish ass, I’m actually, in my own way,
just turning the other cheek


Christian Gentleman to the backbone!

Houli, My Dear Fellow, a man of your expanded worth should not be confined, much less defined by a membership. You do more in a day than most of the Union League Club's overpaid ambulance chasers in two-tone broadcloth $400 shirts do a lifetime.

Who was it that said 'Study everything; join nothing?'

Mike Houlihan's Giant's eyes take in the cant and hypocrisy of our world right here in Chicago. This man is not Clubbable? Pish Posh!

Houli, enact a Club without Walls; found an Association without a Membership Committee. Make it an open membership to whomever you have the grace with whom you deign to congress.

To the phonies, snobs, louts, boors, tightwads - you might be unclubbable.

Saturday, March 09, 2013

Yarns from Cleek Club of Chicago: Ebert's Thumbs Up for Our Irish Cousins: I'm Mike Houlihan and I Make Movies and Drive a Ford!



Careful readers* of these hoary postings will recall that sometime during the waning days of President GW Bush's second term, Chicago auteur, venture-capitalist, swordsman and wit Mike Houlihan was blackguarded by the scions of mighty thin-bloodlines when he applied for membership to Chicago's Union League Club. Ganged together, the off-spring confederation of the Yankee manques who formed that club during the National Rebellion, could now meet in an antique phone booth, but its clout yet cudgels those whom they fear. Chicago's John Huston, Mr. Houlihan, was denied membership.

Oh WASP'S sting yet smarts; though its strike reaches not the heart and soul of good.


Houli turned to a somewhat younger, but equally unclubable worthy and formed Cleek of Chicago.


As its junior member my duties and obligations are solely fiduciary and financial and the rewards are Olympian - I get to hang with Houli.


I took refuge from a broken heart and the ague among Cleek's Doric columns and the walls of gilt Shiraz and Morocco bound volumes ancienne et moderne de la philosophie, de l'histoire et de la littérature.  My foolish heart was broken due to a faux pas that embarrased the woman I love and caused her to shudder in public when I ordered salade avant le plat principal à la manière américaine at Taylor Street's Chez Joel Bistro Francais.  Somethings are just not to be done and I allowed appetite to sweep away fond trust.


 " How could you?" the delicate and chic woman protested.


" Hey, I like salad afore the meat and spuds, Sweetie and guess what?  I'm ladling French Dressing all over the greens and onions . . .in a French restaurant!"


" Oh! Qu'est-ce une bête, vous pouvez être à des moments!"  she sniffed.


" Hey, Garson!  How's about a little more of this bubbly water?"


Here, at this last graceles utterance, fawn-like tears glowed and glistened in the candle-lit quiet and her alabaster skin went crimson, "Je ne te connais même pas!"


"Hey, It's Taylor Street, Sweets and not some Russian novel with the Cossacks playing at Talleyrand."


It took me days to have the import of those thoughtless and unmeasured remarks dent my heart to a full realization of my dastardry.  Anyway. I caught a bad case of coughs and shakes to boot.


In the Cleek, among the books and brandied Toddies I could regroup, what was left of body and soul.


Having devoured Pope's Epistles II, I decanted a needleful of E & J and on this passage:



Say, what can cause such impotence of mind?
A Spark too fickle, or a Spouse too kind.
Wise wretch! with pleasures too refin’d to please;        95
With too much spirit to be e’er at ease;
With too much quickness ever to be taught;
With too much thinking to have common thought:
You purchase Pain with all that Joy can give,
And die of nothing but a rage to live.        100
  Turn then from Wits, and look on Simo’s mate,
No ass so meek, no ass so obstinate:
Or her that owns her faults but never mends,
Because she ’s honest, and the best of friends:
Or her whose life the church and scandal share,        105
For ever in a Passion or a Prayer:


Swine!  Hickey make things right.  Thus, the path to my arching heart and the cordial my ague.  Now, I might attend to the affairs of my fellow man!


I read the Sun Times and howled with approval Roger Ebert's review of Mike Houlihan's documentary epic Our Irish Cousins at the Gene Siskal Film Center.  I fairly jigged with delight that Chicago's Maecenas  of Film had coaxed up two chubby thumbs in favor of Houli's film - and Three out of Four Stars!!!!!!!!


Voila!

 As anyone familiar with Houlihan's work can attest, the man is a born storyteller — the kind of guy who can make a statement along the lines of "You know what's funny? Here's a good story. My brother died ..." and then actually pull it off. He gets a lot of laughs throughout the film, whether from well-polished anecdotes or spontaneous interactions with the people he meets. What is even more impressive, though, is the way that he manages to quietly layer in more serious-minded concerns amidst the laughter so that when he visits the church where his grandfather was baptized more than a century earlier, the scene winds up packing a surprisingly hefty emotional punch. 


Into the Cleek strode my friend! "My dear man!  Oh, Good Show, Houli! This from Ebert?

"Been at the E & J, again." he observed with a director's glass lanyard-ed around his neck.

" One or three to fight the ague and a . . ."

" My name is Mike Houlihan and I make movies."

"Yes, and so much more, like your work riding shotgun on the Salvation Army mobile food wagon in Uptown. . .and . . ."

"I love making pictures but I don't like talking about them.Anybody can direct a picture once they know the fundamentals. Directing is not a mystery, it's not an art. The main thing about directing is: photograph the people's eyes.   It is easier to get an actor to be a cowboy than to get a cowboy to be an actor. It's no use talking to me about art, I make pictures to pay the rent. I didn't show up at the ceremony to collect any of my first three Oscars. Once I went fishing, another time there was a war on, and on another occasion, I remember, I was suddenly taken drunk. For a director there are commercial rules that it is necessary to obey. In our profession, an artistic failure is nothing; a commercial failure is a sentence. The secret is to make films that please the public and also allow the director to reveal his personality.As a beauty, Dolores del Rio is in a class with [Greta Garbo]. Then she opens her mouth and becomes Minnie Minoso . . ."

I was taken a back, somehow my friend had become . . .John Ford!






* the blackuarding of Mike Houlihan by the snobs of the Union League Club - in response Mike founded the Cleek of Chicago - the Driver of the City: Mashies, Rakes and Niblicks are for smaller souls. The Cleek of Chicago is Big, Big Club!

Wednesday, July 08, 2009

Houli is Back - Writing on Cook County: Mike Houlihan's Cook County Buzz at the Examiner


Chicago Renaissance Man, writer, film director, actor and political prognosticator Michael Houlihan is writing and mentor, long-time Chicago News legend, Jim Strong giving sound journalistic advice, at the Chicago Examiner! Recent Forbes Magazine profile subject ( 31st Wealthiest Man Around) Philip Anschutz is the publisher of The Examiner chain.

Mike's monthly Hooliganism for the Irish American News is no where near enough blue collar value point of view for a Metropolitan Area living in a veritable Honesty Desert. With Houlihan there is -No Nuance, No Parsing, No Smarm ( south side culture allows No Smarm - only hot-blooded invective, malediction and blasphemy) and No Group Think Whining that the Pencil Neck Progressives offer. Thus, " We were ALL of Us made better people the day Michael Jackson decided to become Diana Ross - all of us!"

Now, the Chicago Examiner provides writers like Mike Houlihan to present the unvarnished and un-PC truths to readers, wasting away to intellectual nothingness for lack of solid opinion fiber. Houli got Fiber, Y'all!

Houli is fiber rich and chock full of the real McCoy. Here's a taste of Houli's declamation on Goo-Goos ( Good Government Progressive Feebs in Creeps Clothing):

Many goo-goo’s in Cook County are Democrats, but they chafe at the reputation of their party. They elected Blago, but won’t admit it. They love Governor Pat Quinn for his record as a goo-goo, but they reserve disdain for Daley.

Goo-goo’s are so much more than simple good government people; they are patronizing peddlers of pabulum. Like Zorn in the Tribune, Carol Marin in the Sun-Times, or that brilliant seasoned journalist Katie Couric who so intellectually took Sarah Palin to task on what magazines she read during the campaign.

Goo-goo’s belong to Planned Parenthood and PETA and the “Society for the Prevention of Jimmy Pushing Johnny Out of Line”.

Goo-goo’s believe that our new President walks on water and if we don’t see it we are racist luddites.

Goo-goo’s fear Palin more than Putin, Ahmadinejad, Kim Jong Il, and the Pope. She’s the antithesis of the goo-goo worldview, and she just might get elected President someday. That’s what scares them more than anything.



Chicago thanks the Examiner.Com for the return of sense to scene. Houli will be an imporant part of my great breakfast!

Tuesday, December 09, 2008

Prodigious Houlihan Returns to the Hood! Houli at Borders Tonight!



FLASH! To All Readers, Read To's, Redman Chewers, and Red Pop Guzzlers!

Mike Houlihan makes a surprise hop at Borders in Beverly tonight on the Houlihan Highway!

Get thee there!
Houlihan -6PM-9PM at:

Borders - Chicago - Beverly
2210 West 95th Street
Chicago, IL 60643
United States
773-445-5471

Web site: http://www.borders.com/online/store/StoreDetailView_284

Events URL: http://www.borders.com/online/st…

Monday, July 20, 2009

McCourt's Confession forgot St. Vincent De Paul Society



Tavis: If you were a preacher, what do you think your message might be? What would you be coming back to time and time again?

McCourt: Freedom. Well, you can't do that because a religion by its very nature binds you in. It has its parameters or perimeters so you have to follow a certain doctrine. So I'd call myself an atheist in a way - a spiritual, religious atheist, which is a contradiction in terms.

Tavis: Yeah, I hear you.
November 2007

http://www.pbs.org/kcet/tavissmiley/archive/200711/20071128_mccourt.html

Writer Frank McCourt, author of Angela's Ashes died yesterday. I was told of McCourt's worsening condition by the man who directed and produced Frank and Malachy McCourt's career making play A Couple of Blackguards
here in Chicago.

Writer, film maker, actor and wit, Mike Houlihan directed the McCourts during the early 1980's in that play. It really put both men on the map here in Chicago and on Broadway.

Mike Houlihan's long-running and hilarious Chicago tour-de-force Going East on Ashland was the nub of his Thursday night show at Jack Desmond's Pub, in Chicago Ridge last Thursday. After his show, Jazz singer Terry Sullivan, boxing promoter lawyer Mike Joyce and I chatted with Houli. Terry raises money for inner city kids who want an education in a value based environment -Midtown Education Center. Mike Joyce, a lawyer, teaches and coaches boxing to inner city kids here at Leo High School and through Illinois Crime Commission. They are Catholics doing good.
Frank McCourt said goodbye to his Catholic Faith, but used it for his work. Mike Houlihan recounted the news that Mr. McCourt was near death.

"Frank McCourt's in pretty bad shape. I talked to Chris Hart ( son of Moss Hart and Kitty Carlyle who directed Going East on Ashland) and he said that Frank is about done," said the gifted Chicagoan. Mike talked about his time with the McCourt Brothers and the success of Frank McCourt. " McCourt said he was an atheist. I never could get my head around that. For all the ugliness in McCourt's book, remember that it was the St. Vincent DePaul Society that kept Angela and her kids from starvation, while the old man boozed it up," Houlihan offered.

Catholics and Faith in God are not so bad, unless your memory is selective.

The St. Vincent De Paul Society is not a Government agency. It is a charitable act of grace funded by Catholics and friends to help the poor in their most difficult times here on earth. Jewish, Lutheran and Dutch Reformed have similar charter groups making direct help to families. They too are the real Faith-vased initiatives and not adjuncts of big government.

Frank McCourt's passing is sad. He was a talented man. He is now meeting the Trinity that bitterness and sadness allowed McCourt to deny.

While we're here. Let's help Angela and her kids. St. Vincent DePaul Society here in Chicago gets things done. Click my post title for the link to that great work.



Prayer of the Vincentian Family

Lord Jesus, you who willed to become poor,
give us eyes and a heart directed toward the poor;
help us recognize you in them --
in their thirst, their hunger, their loneliness, and their misfortune.

Enkindle within our Vincentian Family
unity, simplicity, humility,
and the fire of love
that burned in St. Vincent de Paul

Strengthen us, so that faithful to the practice of these virtues,
we may contemplate you and serve you in the person of the poor,
and may one day be united with you and them in your Kingdom.

Amen.

Monday, December 03, 2007

Mike Houlihan and the Files of the Cleek Club: Gordon Pasha, Islam, Teddy Bears and Olde English 40's




'Gordon! Drop the Bear! Name Him for the Prophet, Infidel? - Try This Needle Point, Mr. Eminent Victorian!'



KHARTOUM, Sudan - A British teacher jailed for letting her students name a teddy bear Muhammad as part of writing project headed home Monday after being pardoned -- ending a case that set off an international outcry and angered many moderate Muslims.

The incident was the latest in a tense relationship between the West and Sudanese President Omar al-Bashir, an Islamic hard-liner who has been accused by the United Nations of dragging his feet on the deployment of peacekeepers to the country's war-torn Darfur region.
Chicago Tribune 12/03/07

Among the Doric Columns of Chicago's Newest Club, Renaissance Man Mike Houlihan explains International history and Morality to Journeyman Reader Pat Hickey - no mean task that: ( hushed quietude erupted by outraged incredulity!)

'Bugger Birkenhead, Houli! The papers resound with cries of Gordon's Ghost - the good man kebobed in defense of the Khedive of Egypt.'

'Hickey, Old Sod, Lytton Strachey and your devotion to old Bill Thackeray's son-in-law not withstanding, the truth of the matter is that Pasha 'Chinese' Gordon was guilty of the exact same crime as the plump,toothy Brit spinster - (you are yet a widower, Hickey? , never mind )- about to British Airways her way back to Old Blightey as we wheeze here in our New Club - The Cleek of Chicago, Worthington! another Olde English - on my chit - Cheers.'*

'Houlihan, you mean to say that this chubby do-gooder -tendering McGuffey's Reader to the Fuzzy -Wuzzies in the Sudan - is merely another Brit to incur the ire of Islam?'

'Quite. You see, Old Man, Gordon, like most Britons, would slaughter Wogs and Paddies with aplomb and delight all day long, but once Apollo's Orb dipped past the earth's golden sleeve - prosing too purple, am I ?'


'Prose On,do!'

'Once the infernal day ends a Brit likes nothing better than to clutch and snuggle with a plush toy animal - a Plush Bear - termed Teddy here in the emancipated Colonies. You see, Gordon, as a Professional Soldier and Amateur Humanist, liked a good Pet Snuggle along with a whacking good read of Holy Writ over the slaughtered bones of Heathen Chinese caught in Britain's Opium Trade and the Fuzzy Wuzzie's of the languishing Slave Trade; thus Gordon's presence in the Sudan. He had a stuffed bear named Mohammad that he carried with him through China and later in the Sudan. In China, he termed his dear pet Chinkey Freedman, much to the scowls of the pig-tailed Heathen, but once in the Sudan - Mohammad. You see, Hickey, Old Inflamed Colon, Gordon's naming of his pet is what stirred the ire of the Mahdi; brought on the Siege of Khartoum; bankrupted the Gladstone Government; and ultimately chucked the lumber through Gordon's pump. Lessons of History, My Boy, Lessons of Life.'

'Amazing Houli!'

'Quite!'

'Your Chinos are smoking, Old Man!'

'WORTHINGTON! Another 40! Pronto!'

* An earlier Post recounted the low blackguarding of Mike Houlihan by the snobs of the Union League Club - on response Mike founded the Cleek of Chicago - the Driver of the City:Mashies, Rakes and Niblicks are for smaller souls. The Cleek of Chicago is Big, Big Club!

http://hickeysite.blogspot.com/2007/11/chicagos-club-of-unclubable.html

Friday, February 25, 2011

Oscar's Wilde! Houli's 'da Queen on WTTW - That is Mike Houlihan's Film; not T'other Way Around.


Oscar's Fabulously Wilde about Mike Houlihan's Her Majesty 'da Queen - the Docu-epic about Chicago's St. Paddy's Queen pageant.

Houli's film features of WTTW - of all places!




WTTW-11, Chicago's premier public television station, will debut

Mike Houlihan's engaging new documentary Her Majesty, 'da Queen on Sunday,



February 27 at 4:00 pm.

The 60-minute film is a sneak peek backstage at the annual St. Patrick's Day Parade Queen Contest and captures all the humor, heartbreak, and excitement shared by over 100 young women each year as they vie for the crown. Many of Chicago's most endearing Irish-American personalities are also featured in the film in intimate interviews during the pageant.

Her Majesty, 'da Queen was edited from video shot at both the 2009 and 2010 queen contests. This one-hour program is a prologue to Mike Houlihan's epic documentary Our Irish Cousins, which is currently in post-production. Our Irish Cousins was shot all over the U.S. and in Ireland, and reveals the Irish American experience in all its glory, humor, and spirit.


Pull them Rabbit ears aright and call the kids!

Monday, December 26, 2011

Best Christmas Gift EVER! Houlihan Skinny Cargo Pants!

Houli got in 'em; so can I!



I had no idea. The Skinny and Houli Show on WCEV 1540 AM Radio s a cult classic. That I know. However, I had no idea that 'branding' of the two Chicago radio legends had extended to fashion retail*, until I tore open the Chrsitmas gift box from my daughters Clare and Nora.

I had been brought to manly tears with the gifts from Conor The Boxed Set CDs Slim Whitman Live! at Michigan City, Indiana State Correctional Facility- a vegetable slicer and the Hamilton Beach Juicer from the all three Childe Hickeys, but this . . .this was too much!

The Hottest Pants this season: The J Brand Houlihan Skinny Cargo Pant. Seen on everyone from Ciara to Sarah Jessica Parker, Rihanna to Jessica Alba, Khloe Kardashian to Hilary Duff. Featured in Star Magazine, The New York Times and Nylon.

They are the super sexy cargo of the season…strap them on with towering heals or flats and you will look amazing…


The ripping britches came with the requisite applicator - a large plastic forceps with the appearance of a giant sized shoe-horn - in order to snug in the cellulite layers shingle-ing my athletic sinews and corded muscles.

Houli and Skinny should use the Motto of the Irish Republican Army to brand these strides -"Once in; never out!" Tru Dat.


J Brand Houlihan Skinny Cargo Pants in Vintage Olive and many Colors - as seen on Hilary Duff
These super-sexy cargos will become a part of your daily uniform this season. They're casually perfect with a tank top and flip flops , or dress them up with a pair of towering heels and a sexy top for a night out to dinner and the clubs with your army of best girlfriends.

J Brand Houlihan Skinny Cargo Pants in Many Colors


• Skinny Cargo
• Low-Rise
• 10.5-Inch Leg Opening
• 29-Inch Inseam
• 7.5-ounce Luxe Japanese Twill
• 98% Cotton, 2% Lycra






select size: 23 24 25 26 27 31
select color: West PointBlackSharkskinWhiteVintage West Pointrefresh size/colorsDON'T SEE YOUR SIZE OR COLOR?
CLICK HERE TO BE NOTIFIED WHEN IT BECOMES AVAILABLE.



Price: $230.00
$218.50 Save 5% QTY


It's Monday, Bitches!

Saturday, February 27, 2010

White House to Tap Chicago's Own Mike Houlihan to Replace Desiree Rogers



Auteur, Raconteur, bon viveur, agent provocateur, souteneur, connoisseur, rapporteur,
littérateur, farceur, danseur, répétiteur,Beaux sabreur, Monseigneur Michael ( Michel) Houlihan to replace DimBulb Diva Desiree Rogers!


It would make perfect sense. The White House could replace a self absorbed Liability with an UnRepentant Man of the People! Rumors are darting like the icy flakes of wet stuff and clinging to the concrete and clay of Middle America! Hope and Change!

In an exclusive exchange with Film Maker Mike With Both Hands Brand , during a packed book signing at Harte's Saloon in south suburban Evergreen Park, the witty Renaissance Man Houlihan was speechless when I passed on the hot rumor that he was to be named to replace Ms. Rogers - for a moment.

Pulling himself to his full and majestic height, future White House Social Director Mike Houlihan opined -

" When called I will serve at the pleasure of my President! ‘We have the best brand on Earth: the Obama brand, Our possibilities are endless Brand Obama is about to get ripped a new one! Ice e'm Down, Gibbs! Wooooooooooo!"

Saturday, March 29, 2008

Mike Houlihan's Tapioca -The Movie! at First Take Film Festival in Augusta, GA!


Chicago's south side Pride and Own - Mike Houlihan, wit, actor, writer, director, producer, boulevardier, John McCain Backer, free-spender, serial philanthropist, pugilist, patron of the arts,boulevardier, numismatist, and gum arabic Connoisseur announces

Hi Everybody


Our independent feature film, Tapioca, starring Ben Vereen & Tim
Kazurinsky, has been invited to screen at the First Take Film Festival
in Augusta, Georgia from April 8-12th. That's the same week as the
Masters Golf Tournament at Butler National. Is that cool or what! Come
with us! We'd love to have all Chicago pals come to Augusta for the
screening. Check out the festival at
http://www.firsttakefilmfestival.com. Also our website,
www.TapiocaTheMovie.com.

See you in Augusta, the A-U-G!
Mike Houlihan

Monday, January 23, 2012

On My Way to Peggy Kinnane's! Houli's There Wednesday Night, So I Gotta Beat Feet!


I'm as short on carfare as I am on the Cardinal Virtues; therefore, I had better beat feet, take it on Arthur Duffy, hit the bricks, start walking, motor this voter, make movin' behoovin', set sail these barques of mine, toe it north and ease west, hike to Houli* at Peggy Kinane's!

Okay, get snacks and water. Wake the mules and check my directions -

1. Head north on S Rockwell St toward W 107th St
0.1 mi
2. Turn right onto W 107th St
0.2 mi
3. Turn left onto S Western Ave
1.6 mi
4. Slight right to stay on S Western Ave
13.4 mi
5. Turn left onto N Milwaukee Ave
5.7 mi
6. Turn left onto N Northwest Hwy
7.0 mi
7. Continue onto Rand Rd
1.7 mi
8. Turn left onto Seegers Rd
0.7 mi
9. Turn left onto N Broadway St/Seegers Rd
66 ft
10. Turn right onto US-14 W
4.3 mi
11. Turn left onto N Evergreen Ave
354 ft
12. Turn right onto E Campbell St
Destination will be on the right


I'm OFF!




The fun begins at 7PM and Houlihan will tell some preposterous stories from his celebrated book and hold court at this legendary Irish pub till 9PM. Mike is offering all Peggy Kinnane's patrons a 60% discount on the price of his book that night!

Stop into Peggy Kinnane's for some Hooliganism and kick off your St. Patrick's Day shenanigans early. Peggy Kinnane's is located at 8 N. Vail Avenue in Arlington Heights. For more information. Call 847-577-7733.

Stop in and yuck it up with Renaissance Man Mike Houlihan - the man is busier than a retarded kitten trying bury cat poop on a marble floor.

*Mike Houlihan is an award winning writer, actor, producer, director, filmmaker, radio host, and journalist. He began his professional career in 1973 with The American Shakespeare Festival in Stratford, CT and has appeared on Broadway, Off-Broadway, on television, major motion pictures, our nations largest newspapers, periodicals, and bathroom walls. For more info please go to his websites, TapiocaTheMovie.com, ouririshcousins.com and skinnyhouli.com.

Monday, June 21, 2010

I Gotta Piece of Mike Houlihan - I Won't Say Which, But I am Now a Film Producer


" . . .So . . .Hickey took all of his Mercury Head Dimes up to Beverly Bank and asked the girl for a Certified Check Made out to Our Irish Cousins and his Cousin Willie cashed it! Hickey took the short bus to school."






I just bought a piece of Mike Houlihan's New Documentary Film - Our Irish Cousins (click Post Title). Actually, I made a tax-deductible donation.

As a civic minded patron of the arts in Chicago, I believe that my financial largesse is needed to make sure that fine films find their way to a public athirst for features that build community.

I call upon every Big Shoulders Gaius Maecenas to drop a few Jacksons and help Mike Houlihan get this work out of the can and threading the projectors in fine theatres near you!

Saturday, February 24, 2018

My Lunch with Jeanne Ives

Image result for Jeanne and Rich Ives

Yesterday, I took the Rock Island Metra from 103rd to La Salle Street station for an 11:30 luncheon of the Finance Committtee of Ives for Illinois.  I was flattered to be invited, because I do not have two-nickels to rub together.

I helped Chicago Renaissance Man Mike Houlihan form  the Irish for Ives which will host a fundraiser at Reilly's Daughter on Monday, March 5th between 5-7PM.  That will be a great event, where traditional Democrats like me can ask Jeanne Ives about their public service pensions, Bosco Rauner's lie, that Representative Ives shovels Mike Madigan's snow covered sidewalks over on Kedvale & 64th and how she plans to get Illinois back on its feet.I passed out some fliers to my fellow passengers who either accepted them, or politely declined.  Most took them.  One woman chatted me up and said that she will probably go to the event.
5 to Watch: The Final Day of the 2018 Pyeongchang GamesImage result for rauner paul bauer funeral
Jeanne Ives has nowhere near the money to respond to Governor "Bosco" Rauner's calumnies.  This same place-holding creep, tried to hijack the funeral of Commander Paul Bauer and equated drinking chocolate milk to solving race relations.   As such many 19th Ward residents are buying the ads from Governor Bosco, like they were words coming from a burning bush:

                      She's a Madigan crony!
                      She is hateful, bigoted and wants my pension

All without any examples given other than repetitions of Eric Zorn, or Sun Times talking points.

The worst comes from a shirt-tail cousin of mine with a swell County job, who will be working to re-elect Toni Preckwinkle shortly.
If you see the "Irish for Ives" posters up on the South Side, let the businesses know you won't support them. I saw one on 111th in Mt Greenwood today and they immediately agreed to take it down. There's supposed to be a fundraiser for her at Reilly's Daughter Oak Lawn. Let them know too.
He attached a smear piece from Daily Kos 2013 about Ives the Union Buster though the same Union Buster has been supported by IUEO 150.  Jeanne Ives must be scaring the hell out of people who want to keep things going the way they are.  They know if Ives knocks Rauner out in the primary, JB Pritzker will not have the planned can of tomatoes in the 15 round bout in November.  Nor, do they want Jeanne Ives to face Chris Kennedy, let alone Progressive Boy Toy Biss.   So union leaders who were all-in for Rahm want Rauner to lay down in November for them all.

The rank and file union membership are stuck with the property taxes, the water bills, the lousy schools and are told who not to vote for.

Union voters must declare in a primary polling place and people have big ears, adapted to the slightest volume thanks to street cash and Rauner has plenty.  I takes a very special kind integrity to take an unsanctioned ballot in Chicago.

Tearing down posters and threatening business boycotts?   These same union loyalists shop at WalMart and regularly cross picket lines to snag an Italian beef.   Hey, it's a free country. . .still.

I arrived at the Union League Club and was asked to man the greeter's table for a few minutes, which I did and introduced myself while I handed out name tags.

A gentleman by the name of Mike Schultz was carrying a huge briefcase and asked me, " I suppose Ives is a Democrat, this being Illinois.  I am coming from Wisconsin and satyed here over night."

I explained that Jeanne Ives was running against Gov. Bruce Rauner in the March Primary as a Republican and he asked me about her.  I explained that Ives is the only Pro-Life candidate for the office of Governor by either Party,  was a comon sense fiscal conservative who wants to halt the run-away pension crisis while easing the pain of the victims of former Governor Jim Edgar's IOU briberies, a West Point grad and Army officer, mother of five children two of whom serve in the armed forses and honest,tough and good humored, happy person.

Jeanne Ives came up the stairs and we met for the first time, " Pat Hickey, it's nice to see a Facebook person in person."

I introduced the Guv to Mr. Schultz.

Mr. Schultz is a dreamer, of German, Irish and Japanese blood, who grew up in Bridgeport.  His grandmother lived two doors down from the real Mayor - Richard J. Daley.   Schultz went on to explain that he was selling a product that he helped developed - a pain relieving lotion made from hemp oil.  He is searching States for the expansion of his business and is skipping Illinois as toxic to innovation and industry.

Mike Schultz gave me a bottle of the lotion for my retired carpenter brother who is crippled up with artheritis in his knees, hands, shoulders and ankle.  He is no fan of Trump, Rauner, or Ives.  I am a huge fan of Jeanne Ives.

Mr. Schultz bid farewell and said, " I am very impressed with you, Mrs. Ives.  Best of luck!"

We were called into lunch/

I knew Dan Proft and was astonished to see him  with whiskers.  I was introduced to Jeanne's husband Rich, who is an engineer and a West Point man.  He had been with Kenny Construction, when the great flood washed through the Loop.  Rich is like  . . .every guy I know in this neighborhood, funny, embarassed to be there, serious about his wife and his family.   Rich Ives would be at ease at Kens, Barney Callaghan's or Hinky Dinks.  Alas,Mr. Ives gave up beer and smokes for Lent.

There at my table sat Mike Houlihan with two gentleman donors, as well as Dan Patlak, the only Republican in Cook County government, and Representative Tom Morrison.  We later joined by Mr. Spencer from Christ the King Parish.  Jim Tobin and John Powers sat with the Ives' and Chair of Finance Committee Mr. Vince Kolber, an elegant Polish gent from Seneca, NY who adopted Illinois as his home state, built a mechanical service corporation RESIDCO, funds The Little Sisters of the Poor and The Big Shoulders Fund.   Real robber-baron type.

We began with the Pledge of Allegiance and Mr. Kobler explained his notion of fund-raising which matched that of the great Bob Foster of Leo High School - make everyone an investor.

Most people believe that fundraising is whale-hunting. Everyone seems to believe the notion of nailing down a million dollar give, as the pinnacle of success. No.  Leo High School defied the know-it-alls for decades, including my own two, but counting on committed people.  Leo's Alumni are like 17th Century Jesuit Black Robes - they drag in new converts and turn those converts into missionaries.

Jeanne Ives has the support of this Democrat because she is honest, happy and heroic.  One older gentleman in  Mount Greenwood told me " She's gonna win!  The little girl has alot of hard bark on her." That, she do.
Vince Kolber, running for 5th Congressional District
Vince Kobler is accepting checks for Ives for Illinois and he wrote another huge one yesterday. Vince Kobler had writtne big checks for Governor Bruce "Bosco" Rauner, until he proved himself to be the fraud that he happens to be.  Jeanne Ives was handed a check in the amount of $ 300,000.

Mike Houlihan and I felt the change in our pockets.

Jeanne Ives thanked Mr. Kobler, who himself had run for Congress in the 5th District in 2016, for leading her 'rag-tag band of insurgents'  who depend upon people power to get her message out.

Ives noted that all Rauner has is money, lots and lots and lots and lots of money.   Fund-raising is the art of friend making.

Jeanne Ives praised Mike Houlihan and me for our work on the upcoming Reilly's Daughter event.  In a room full of well-to-do women and men, it was uncommonly nice of Jeanne to recognize two broke boys.

Like I said, fund-raising is friend making and Jeanne Ives was on way to Peoria.  She had just comeback from Decatur, Belleville, and Watseka, Illinois, where union members learned the truth about Ives for Illinois from Jeanne Ives herself.

I wish my shirt-tail cousin and a few of louder partisans were as fair-minded.


I met Jeanne Ives and I don't have two-nickels together.


Wonder if Rauner, or JB Pritzker would give me two hoots in hell?


It's your vote.

Hey leave up the signs.  Don't go to the event.  Even better, don't vote.










Monday, December 05, 2011

Mike Houlihan Gives Guv a Swiftian Kick in the Jacobs



Last month Governor Pat Quinn was criticized for attending the Personal PAC ( Planned Parenthood's ATM)Honors Awards Banquet by the Catholic Bishops of Illinois. Personal PAC is all about funding abortions with State of Illinois dollars. Catholic Bishops and Catholics do not accept abortion as anything but the murder of a child.

Terry Cosgrove, President of Personal PAC/Gay Activist/Lawyer/State Employee, immeditely crafted the compelling narrative for the media - Cardinal George and the Catholic Bishops were being mean to a rape victim. Not so, but that is the spin.

The Bishops want another heart-to-heart with Pat Quinn who is already sponged and oiled by his cut-man Terry and the media. The Media is the editorial boards and iconic columnists who take up print space from reporters.

Pat Quinn, as well as the rape victim who is a Director of Personal PAC and helped Terry Cosgrove elect Quinn as Governor of Illinois, plays the martyr: Bishops are Catholic meanies and Quinn is a Christian Cupcake.

So, another round of chat and media Catholic bashing is set for the Christmas Holiday Season.

Mike Houlihan is an actor, author, film-maker and journalist. Houli is a pal of mine. This December's issue of Irish American News features Houli at his best- crafting a satirical sage that Un-PCs the hypocrisy that is a daily feature of Illinois public life and also a good swiftian kick in the dainty cookies* of Illinois Governor Pat Quinn - metaphorically and allegorically speaking to be sure.

I offer the Man in Full -Houli!

Malachy Swift was not a bit modest
about being a dog lover. He loved
his Irish Setter Finoola.
Malachy was so in love with
Finoola that he wanted to marry
her. After all, Malachy and Finoola
had been cohabitating for almost
a decade and that alone was evidence
of the integrity of their union.
They’d been together even longer in
dog years.
Actually it was dog years that
gave their romance that May-December
quality. Malachy was only
in his late twenties and had met
Finoola when she was a pup and
he was just graduating from high
school. So she was quite a bit older
than Malachy.
Malachy had invented a computer
application during college
and made a fortune on the Internet
matching up dates for the LGBT
crowd on his website, “Sockets &
Wenches.” He’d dabbled in the gay
lifestyle himself but soon grew
weary of the endless merry go
round. Malachy was curious about
inter-species affection.
One night while combing out
Finoola’s shiny red coat after an
Elton John concert at The United
Center they took their relationship
a step further. He put on a Johnny
Mathis record of Christmas songs
and poured a half bottle of Pinot
Grigio into Finoola’s bowl.
Before you knew it they were
both head over paws in love. Malachy
proposed the next night over
some milk bones and liver as he
placed a diamond collar around
Finoola’s neck and popped the
question. It was a modest proposal.
She said “Woof!” which Malachy
took as a yes.
The nuptials were delayed a bit
when they wouldn’t grant them
a marriage license at the County
Clerk’s Office. Malachy was not the
type of guy to wait though and he
immediately made a phone call to
his old friend the Governor.
The Governor sensed an opportunity
and insisted that Malachy come
for dinner at the Mansion the following
night. Malachy had donated
quite a bit of dough to the Gov’s
campaign because he believed in
his agenda of raising taxes and
increased abortions.
After a sumptuous dinner, the
two men sat smoking cigars and
sipping brandy in front of the fire
as Malachy made his pitch.
“This is very, very, very important
to me Governor. And to all of us
who crave inter species marriage.”
Are you looking for marriage to
all animals or just dogs?
“Well in my case it should be just
Irish setters and I know you’d be
on board with that because we’re
both Irish.”
Irish Catholics!
“Exactomondo! I suppose we
should include all dogs and most
farm animals as well.”
But Malachy, let’s please exclude
pigs so we don’t piss off any
Muslims.
“By the way, Governor, I must ask
you. What was that delicious dish
we had for an appetizer tonight? I
don’t think I’ve ever tasted anything
so succulent or sweet.”
I thought you’d enjoy those
Malachy. Those are baby fingers
and toes. Planned Parenthood sends
them over by the truckload. I got the
recipe from the White House chef at
the Inauguration Ball. You can only
use first trimester babies because
those are the most tender.
“Well they are just scrumptious.“
The Governor clinked his glass
with Malachy and the two agreed
that the next day legislation would
be introduced to legalize inter-species
marriage throughout the state.
Malachy thanked the Governor
and made out a $500,000 check, on
behalf of his organization Privacy
PAC, to the Committee to re-elect
the Governor. Privacy PAC is committed
to electing legislators who
support animal husbandry.
The two shook hands and Malachy said, “I’d like to get married
in church, but I have a feeling
that might be a problem.”
Not if you go to my priest, Father
Larry, over in Oak Park.
“Oh, did he officiate at your
marriage?”
Uh, no Malachy, actually I’m
…divorced.
“Was she a bitch?”
Well, she wasn’t an Irish
Setter.



A well placed kick to the Jacobs can often have salabrious effect upon a man in great need of re-thinking his point of view and publc posture. The Catholic Bishops of Illinois might be well-served having Mike Houlihan along as a consultant and avoid another bait-and-switch from a politician who uses Catholic when it suits him.

However, if the politician's said Jacobs have been well-oiled with Novocaine, those numbed anatomical twin orbs will not register the well-placed and powerful punt.

The rest of us get it.

Jacobs - Cockney rhyming slang - Jacob's Cream Crackers = knackers/cookies/reproductive vessles.

Saturday, April 20, 2013

We are All Linked to Boston's Trouble and its Triumph

Chicago Boxer Fought Boston Bomb Suspect
Leo Boxer and future Captain of Team USA Lamar Fenner Defeated the Chechen Terrorist Tamerlan Tzarnaev in 2009; Boston and Massachusetts 1st Responders defeated Tamerlan and his kid brother who attacked Boston and America in 2013.

The big Russian kid in the photo had the reach, the height and the weight on Lamar Fenner.  Lamar had a Catholic education and coach Mike Joyce.  No contest.

I get to Leo between 4:30-5 AM every morning.  My e-mails contain Alumni updates and dates notices.   In the mix was a note from my friend, Chicago playwright, film maker, actor, journalist and author Mike Houlihan.

Pat=One of the Chechyan (sp?) terrorist brothers foughLamar Fenner last year in the ring! See Deadspin story.
Houli
Houli
I checked it out, the fight was in 2009.  Lamar had not been fighting since 2010 due to an eye injury. I remembered also that Lamar and Mike Houlihan had joined Leo/Celtic Boxing Coach Mike 'Pickle' Joyce for an evening out with Boston-born actor and star of Rescue Me Denis Leary a few years back.

You may recall that Rescue Me concerned 1st Responders -NYFD Firemen - who ran to danger on 9/11 lived with the consequences of that heroism.
SALT LAKE CITY UT - MAY 4:  Tamerlan Tsamaev (L) fights Lamar Fenner (R) during 201-pound divisiboxing match during
Mike Joyce taught Lamar Fenner to "to work inside" -heart matters.

I posted a blurb, or blog about Lamar's defeat of the Chechen kid who repaid American welcome with a couple of pressure cookers he and his little brother had packed with nails, BBs, ball-bearing and explosives set to a timer made from a kid's toy.  Their thank you to Boston and America tore off legs and limbs of scores of strangers and murdered a little boy and two girls.

Boston, despite the mouthings of political know-it-alls, is a great town full of splendid human beings.  You can walk Boston itself in a day on foot which is not a bad idea given the traffic and the parking.  My buddy Mark Manning and his massive family grew up in the projects of Dorchester. Mark became a skilled surgeon, did twenty five years in the Air Force and practices in Del Rio, TX.I have friends in Dorchester and South Boston, as well as some shirt-tail cousins.  My friends the Jordans of Oak Park, once lived in Watertown, where the little brother monster was grabbed.  My daughter Nora worked and lived in Boston for the better part of year, until the marketing company for which she worked tanked.

On one visit in the early 1980's my fiance and I were treated to dinner at Mr. Anthony's by a guy in his late forties we had met in a bar near Fenway Park.  We were introduced to Jimmy, by a mutual friend.  He was fascinated that with Illinois, the Civil War, Camp Douglas and Abraham Lincoln, as well as the fact that Mary and I were high school teachers.

We thought he was pulling our legs, but our friend assured us that Jimmy meant what he said.  The next night, Mary and I were treated like Kennedys at Anthony's Pier 4 and everything had been "paid with cash including a very generous tip for the staff."

Several years later, my wife Mary held up a front page picture of Jimmy touted as Most Wanted Man in America. " This is our pal Jimmy."

Well, He was nice to us.

Today, people are saying the same thing about the Brothers Tsarnaev.  Mike Joyce put things very well in today's Chicago Sun Times article about Lamar's fight with Tamerlan:As for Tsarnaev, 


Joyce said he was stunned by the allegations that he was a terrorist. “It boggles my mind,” he said. “Boxing is an individual sport, a fraternity. It requires a lot of dedication. For a boxer to get involved in something as insane as terrorism, I just don’t know.”
I'll try, Pick.


  • Lamar's father was Chicago Fireman - a 1st responder
  • Lamar's Mom and Dad chose a Catholic school for him - where he was coached by you, Herman Mills, Eddie Perkins, Luther Rawlings and the great Bob Foster.  
  • Lamar learned accountability from his parents, you and teachers like Bob Foster ( who authoritatively and rhetorically tuned-up Lamar on more than one occasion, Brother O'Keefe, Brother Finch, Pete Doyle, Ed Adams and Mike Holmes,
  • Lamar knew that 7,000 plus Leo Alums had his back and that he was accountable for his actions and would own the consequences forgetting Christ.
  • Lamar saw a crucifix on every wall at Leo and that it was there for more than a decoration
Lamar Fenner won a decision.

Tamerlan Tzarnaev and his little brother decided not to be reminded of anything of real consequence.


They never were taught that we are all linked to Boston.