I am SO evolved and So There!
Saturday, July 25, 2009, from 10 am - 6 pm (Learn about the special festivities planned to celebrate the Newberry Book Fair 25th anniversary!)
I am brushing up my Eccos! This is no south side Pierogi Fest, or Irish beer swill with music. I will dress the part of the 56 year old progressive, hip and still got it baby - man about town! Well, some parts of town.
I want to give off the image that I'm a successful full fledged academic on holiday. Polo shirts with khaki pants won't do and everyone working the stands will be wearing the same thing that gives that Public Television WTTW Pledge Drive but Outdoors impression. Me Too.
First - a trip to John's on 111th to get a near-shave on the noggin - Ala Billy Ayers, Dick Simpson, Moby, Uncle Fester from Smashing Pumpkins and Gay activists. White guys should never shave their heads and Hipsters get close to that but not down to the bone. We middle aged south side close knit ethnic types still tend to the The Princeton or the Boy's Regular haircut. Also, no shave 'til Sunday Mass. You hasta give off the three day growth Old Guy Miami Vice Nubby Stubble Look - Like Billy Ayers and Pete and Peggy Seeger.
Second - Get a stud ear ring. Every fifty-something Hispter that's really with it has one. I might need take a handful of pain killers and couple of Olde English 40's to that. DoooooooooooDe!
Third - Cotton, Cotton Cotton! - Something loose and breezy maybe some sort of faux Tolstoy peasant shirt ( white) belted with a good quality knotted rope from Mount Greenwood True Value. Britches?????? Cargo shorts extra baggy and shin length, or patchwork blue jeans? Hmmmmm. Maybe a standard issue Che T or a Tie-Dyed
Fourth - Footwear - Birkenstocks or Eccos? Sandals or boaters? No socks. Stangkee Feet Caynt Be Beat!
Fifth - Deportment to match the schedule! Yes, yes . . . I have been North of Madison many times and the most important thing to wear is (I agree) a big smile! I'm the customer!!! So Sally and Seth, don't sit behind your table, Duckies, Get off your Lard and come over and be helpful, or I'll get all Catholic school on you! . Stand the whole time and have something to keep you looking busy. "See my smile? I can be passive aggressive too. Don't you think that you might want to have a better attitude and please dont smoke? Did you really wash your hands after handling that Nelson Algren hardcover and you're not going to eat that roasted corn? Is that organic corn? Where's the beer tent?"
Here's the schedule and my expected behavior.
Celebrate 25 years of inexpensive used books at the Newberry's annual Book Fair. We have a record number of books to sell this year! More than 110,000 donated books will be sorted into 70 categories for your browsing convenience. With many books priced under $2, it's easy to replenish your home library's holdings on subjects ranging from antiques to zoology.
Admission is free.
Parking: The Newberry Library does not have a visitor parking lot. Limited metered parking is available on area streets. Daytime and evening parking restrictions do apply, so be sure to read the posted signs carefully. Garage parking is also available in the neighborhood. No Hummers; No Buicks; No Lincolns; No Fords and No Chevies.
The following garages offer discounted parking to Newberry patrons ($7 for 0-8 hours; $9 for 8-10 hours). Remember to bring your parking ticket with you so it can be validated by the Newberry security guard. The Sheehan Family at 10857 will let you use their drive way but then you need to take Metra downtown and transfer to the CTA
100 West Chestnut Street (enter on Clark Street)
100 East Walton Street (valet service)
Festivities on Saturday, July 25
9 am – Complimentary yoga presented in Washington Square Park by lululemon athletica - Pass. Where's the beer ticket booth?
10 am – Book Fair opens
10:30 am – Complimentary kids’ yoga presented in Washington Square Park by Get Healthy Chicago
12 pm – Meet the Author: Alex Kotlowitz (book signing) Author of Never a City So Real a wonderful, short study of Chicago. I will leave him alone.
Bughouse Square Debates (1 pm to 4 pm)
1 pm – Rick Kogan Welcome! - " Hey, Kogan, You Bastard! It's Hickey!! Yeah, that's right! You were 'spozed to have me back on your show and talk about my novel! Yeah, I'm heckling! What's the matter? Not so tough when don't have Steve Bertrand to back you up! . . . Terry, in a minute, I . . . no I have not had enough beer. My Mom is in Orland; Okay? Kogan! I'm here allllll Daaaayyyy!!!!!!"
1:15 pm – Presentation of the Altgeld award to High School Teacher Barb Thill - Clap politely.
1:35 pm – Main debate (Abraham Lincoln vs. Stephen Douglas) "Go Douglas! Little Giant Rocks! No Lincoln; No War!"
2:15 pm – Memorial tributes to Studs Terkel, Leon Despres, Franklin Rosemont and Judith Krug - " Hey, . . . why you call the cops on me??????" A wide-eyed Terry Sullivan watches in disgust and mild disbelief. Ms. Sullivan calls Hickey's kids, " I am afriad your father is at Chicago Ave. Police Station. I will post bail, but I am going home. Please, have your Father call me . . . when Hell Freezes!"
2:30 pm – Soapbox Debates ( still in custody)
3:45 pm – Dil Pickle award presented ( still in custody)
6 pm – Book Fair closes for the day
9:45 P.M - Hickey gets released into the custody of his kids. The elegant,polite and beautiful Ms. Terry Sullivan awaits the forth coming apology "Oh, No" Phone call.
The 2009 Book Fair is generously supported by Whole Foods Market, Hallett Movers, and by our media partner, Flavorpill.
Many thanks to the following restaurants for donating lunches to our many wonderful Book Fair volunteers:
Fox and Obel Food Market
Goddess and Grocer
Go RomaJewell Events Catering
Occasions Chicago Catering
All kidding aside . . . I am so there! I love books and I love people who love books. I'm a lover.
Newberry Folks! I'll behave . . . Honor Bright!