While Obama distracts Xi with yarns about his days as a community activists, Vlad goes all-in for some International Dim Sum Yum, Yum.
Ride a Bear, Check
Kill a Tiger,Check
Take Crimea, Check
Yank Down Obama's Britches Repeatedly, Check
Hit on Xi's Old Lady, Check and Mate!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Old Vlad is Bad! That borscht slurping, poisoned umbrella swordsman got it goin' on! Oriental chicks swear that Occidental horn-dogs are obsessed with them and Vlad Putin is not about to put that notion to bed, Sisters!
It seems that Vlad Without Borders went after the Head Red's toothsome wife, Peng.
"While Xi was distracted talking to U.S. President Barack Obama, who was sitting on his right, Russia's tiger-shooting, horseback-riding president made his move. After a brief exchange -- you can almost imagine Peng making appropriately cliché small talk like "my, isn't it chilly in here" -- Putin abruptly stood up, grasped a tan coat in both hands, and wrapped it chivalrously around the first lady's shoulders. She smiled gracefully, thanked him, and sat down -- only to surreptitiously slip the coat from her shoulders moments later into the waiting arms of an attendant."
Here is Boris Badinoff being Bad enough at the China Meet-Up.