Friday, June 05, 2009

David Brooks - LapDog for a New Millenium

"What in the hell is Dave Brooks doing in there, for Crissakes? The Kid's gotta be soft." Cautious, Clever, Machiavellian Neighborhood Guy opines.

Chicagoans like to see themselves as pragmatists, not ideologues.
that means they contain both sides of The Great Tension. In Chicago, there is a tension between the lakefront and the neighborhoods inland. The lakefront tends to be idealistic, earnest and liberal. The neighborhoods are clever, cautious and Machiavellian. In all great endeavors, the Obama administration weaves together both of these tendencies.
David Brook NY Times: Dweeb and Victim*

Click my Post title for Lap-dog little Dave Brooks' Hosanna for President Obama! Little Dave, feels the Friendship Train is pulling out without his chubby little fingers gripping the boarding handle. Run, Dave, Run! Atta boy.

Really, Dave? So you're gonna lecture us on Pragmatism, while planting a wet one on the President's Permanent Vertical Smile? That's nice. All you really need to do is smooch, Cupcake; no need to parse.

Dave, You Sweet boy! I mean that, in the Cook County sense! Listen up, you smarmy little dweeb.

Aw, Jesus, now he's crying. Come on, Dave, this is not how a Chicago Big Boy behaves!

Dave, that's how clever, cautious, Machiavellians address doofi from beyond the Pale of clever, cautious Machiavellian neighborhood limits. Dave you ain't from Canaryville; that's no sh%t! Hell, even a starving Hyde Park dwarf with rickets would stuff you in an ash-can.

Nice Dichotomy, Dave, get that in school?

I was up in the idealistic, earnest and liberal Lakefront last night for an event hosted by a Ward that takes in both Idealistic, Earnest and Liberal people, as well as Clever, Cautious and Machiavellian folks. It was a hoot. They Pragmatically took up plates and scooped up Cream Cheese Dip, Italian Sausage and Peppers, Mashed Spuds and Gravy ( non-Italian variety), and broasted chickens and then balanced the plates with great Pragamatism while nailing back long-neck beers.

It was a celebration of Diversity! That has been going on since the cow kicked the lantern, you Dope.

While smooching the President's elegant ass, Dave, you do not need to pretend that you actually understand Chicago. It is out of your Ivy League, Cupcake.

Focus on Georgetown and the bow-tie wearing sissies, four-eyes. Just kidding. You know, like the Pansies on MSNBC do all the time.

*Out in the Cautious, Clever and Machivellian Chicago neighborhoods, where Moms are married to Dads and breed kids, young fellows like Dave Brooks get encouraged not to wear capes, crowns and Indian headdresses to high school ( at least); thus avoiding Victimhood.

Here in Chicago's neighborhoods, we can spot a potential victim from a city block away. 'Oh, that poor kid in the Paris Hilton is Hot! T-shirt really should not intrude upon that group of Gangster Disciples (GD's) and ask them WHAT TIME'S IT?'

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