'What are you drinking?'
'What you pay for it?'
'There's a fountain over there - the water's all paid for.'
'This is better; it's in a bottle.'
That was a conversation that I had with each of my three children. They, each one of them, believe that McDonald's is haute cuisine because it is packaged and marketed by suits who get obscene salaries and shilledby a Clown right out of Michael Jackson's wildest dreams - that clown really creeps me out!
Enter Chicago Alderman George Cardenas. A guy with His head locked on it's swivel! NO GOOSE GUTS - NO NANNY STATE GOOFBALL IDEAS - COMMON SENSE. Tax bottled water. Bring in some revenue without costing the tax-payers a lung! We paid for the water already. Now, we need to bottle it ourselves - horrors for some delicate souls no doubt.
Chicago has the best and cleanest water in the nation thanks to the Jardin Water Filtration Plant. It keeps up with the toxins tossed into our Lake by the Brits of BP Oil. Great corporate citizens those beauties. This tax makes sense and it will make solid dollars out the two-bit tax. Too bad it missed LaLaPalooza - plenty of Green Tree Huggers drinking redundant water out of petroleum based by-product toxic vessels! How many empties to make Mt. Vrdolyak even higher along the Bishop Ford? There is so only so much room in that land-fill and with all the disposable diapers, six-pack rings, Pringles Packs, and old polyester suits and softball jerseys - Mt. Vrodolyak is getting tighter than pockets on a fat man's pants. Tax them water bottles. 'Three Bucks A Bottle!???!!!' We, Chicagoans, have perfectly good Lake Michigan Straight!
Call it the vain idiot tax -for paying a lung for water in the first place: 'I drink only Aqua Snob!' That certainly makes you smarter, taller and thinner! Gee, where can I toss my hard-earned dollars away like you, Cuthbert? Do Eskimos purchase vanity ice cubes? No doubt the would, if they had an Inuit Idiot like Joe Moore in the Frozen North! Tax Plastic Bottled Water! Alderman Cardenas, you are on!
Bottled water - bottled by whom? - comes in petroleum waste products - landfill fuel that tax-salaried employees must haul away. Let's help pay those folks - Tax Bottled Water! We got plenty of the best drinking water in the world, tight here in Chicago. Alderman Cardenas, you are great example of why Mexican Americans deserve their growing leadership position in American Political Life: effective, smart and public spirited ideas that can and should be implemented! Well done, Sir!
Now watch all of the nitwits League and Coalition up against you! You'll do fine , Alderman!
Tuesday, August 14, 2007
Posted by pathickey at 5:52 AM