Australian Drunk Not as Stupid as University of Illinois

I bought BP shares in April of last year.

I worked for John McCain.

I went Sturgeon Fishing with my face.

I entertained myself by Casino gambling.

I eat bacon and lard sandwiches.

I drive the speed limit and stay in my lane on Vincennes Ave..

I read Huffington Post and Progress Illinois

but I never would have fired Kenneth Howell, nor would I get a skin full of booze and hop on the back of a Croc . . . I don't imagine I would ride Croc.